Faith and Second Chances
by Lucinda
Summary: A change in how things unfolded after the discovery of Faith's body switching and its aftermath.  Going AU season 4.  Series now complete.
1. Broken Faith

Faith and Second Chances: Broken Faith  
  
author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg13  
  
main characters: Buffy, Riley  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any charactrs from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
He felt like his whole life had been turned upside down all over again. First, he'd felt like his whole life had been a lie when he'd discovered that yes, demons and vampires were real, and he would be helping hunt them. Things had gone twisted again when he learned that the Slayer was real, and he was dating her. Now? Faith, the other Slayer, had somehow switched bodies with Buffy. It hadn't been his girlfriend that he'd held last night, that he'd tried to sooth from whatever inner nightmares haunted her, it had been Faith, in Buffy's body.  
  
About next, someone would probably tell him there really was a tooth fairy.  
  
On second thought... the way things tended to go in this place, he didn't want to see what they'd do to the Tooth Fairy. Probably some sort of nasty little thing that crept in and fed on emotions or dreams... stole the breath out of sleeping children... Something disgusting and terrible.  
  
Buffy was sitting in his room. On the chair, her arms folded across her chest, glaring at him. Riley blinked, trying to figure out exactly why she looked so furious. He'd tried to learn how to read people, to understand their moods and behavior. Right now, that practice was saying that she was furious, and someone was in deep trouble. Probably him.  
  
"Hey. What's wrong?" He smiled, hoping that he could get out of this with no broken bones. He still remembered that sparring session they'd had...  
  
She stood up, moving towards him in an angry motion that was almost stomping, but far too quiet. Her eyes were cold, angry, not the loving eyes of the girl he'd held close. "How could you do that? How could you... with HER?"  
  
"Buffy... I.... I thought... I thought she was you." Riley felt at a loss. His girlfriend was accusing him of cheating on her, because he'd... they had... except that it hadn't been Buffy after a rough day, it had been Faith.  
  
"WHAT?! You thought she was me? How could you not notice? How could you not know that something wasn't right?" She looked just about mad enough to spit nails, to borrow one of his grandfather's favorite expressions.  
  
Riley know in that moment that things would never be the same between himself and Buffy. "I knew something wasn't right, but I thought... I thought you'd just had a rough day."  
  
"A rough day? My God, Riley. A rough day is a bad test, a broken nail, maybe car troubles. She stole my body! She took over my life! That is not a bad day." Buffy's eyes were bright with fury, and was that... a tear trickled out of the corner of her eyes, making her lashes a spikey shimmer. She wiped it away with an angry motion.  
  
"Buffy..." He reached towards her, wanting to offer apologies, sympathy, whatever it took to make her see that he hadn't meant to hurt her.  
  
She swatted his hand away with enough force that it almost made him loose his balance, his hand tingling and almost numb. "NO! No more words, no more anything. Don't touch me. Just... don't."  
  
"I'm sorry." He felt like he was standing in a house of cards that was toppling slowly all around him.  
  
She just glared at him, stalking across the room, exiting in a huff, slamming the door behind her. A picture fell from the wall, the glass cracking as it hit the floor, and the plastic cup that he kept by his bed in case he was thirsty in the night toppled, water splashing over the floor.  
  
"Well, that didn't go very well." He knew that that had been a break up scene. He just felt lucky that he didn't have any broken bones. Just a bruised heart. He had expected bad, but not quite that bad.  
  
end Broken Faith. 


	2. Offer of Help

Faith and Second Chances: Offer of Help  
  
author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg13  
  
main characters: Riley, Faith  
  
second in 'Faith and Second Chances'  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
  
  
  
  
Riley wandered down into the common area of the dorm, feeling oddly numb. Except for his hand, which felt rather bruised, actually. Buffy had broken up with him. Because of Faith? Or was it something else, and Faith just a convenient excuse?  
  
"Yo, Riley. Check it out - we got people taking hostages at one of the old churches." One of the other guys called out, his hand gesturing towards the news program.  
  
Looking more closely, Riley saw a woman with dark hair in the background. She was pretty, but that wasn't what had caught his attention. It was the way she held herself, the way she looked like a wolf about to pounce. That had to be Faith. And unless he misread her entirely, she was going to try to take out the guys with the guns.  
  
Something stirred inside, and he found himself remembering pain filled hazel eyes asking him to 'just hold me'. Eyes of someone that had seen so many terrible things, so much pain. Now, she was trying to make things better. He had to help her... somehow.  
  
Before he'd really had time to think about it, he'd grabbed a first aid kit, a taser, and a pistol and was out the door, driving his jeep towards the old church. Even Slayers could use back up on occasion. If she'd let him.  
  
Naturally, his plans to be the heroic cavalry were crumbled by the time he'd arrived. Faith had already taken them down, and they were surrendered into police custody. So much for the heroic Riley Finn rescuing the damsel in distress… He looked up, and saw something along the road, possibly a person walking away.  
  
He drove that way, pulling to a crawl beside her. The dark hair hung loose around her shoulders, and she almost looked… weak, defeated. "Hey, can I offer you a lift somewhere? A cup of coffee maybe?"  
  
She looked up, her eyes darker than Buffy's, warier. "Think I look like I need coffee?"  
  
He grinned, trying to look harmless. "You look like it couldn't hurt."  
  
For a long moment, she just looked at him, as it trying to make up her mind. "What the hell… why not. You buying?"  
  
"I think I can spot you a cup of coffee. See, I know what you did back there, Faith. You helped those people." He just hoped that she wouldn't throw the offer back in his face.  
  
She sighed, climbing into the jeep. Faith didn't quite look at his face, her gaze instead setting on his hand where it rested on the gear shift. "Look… I shouldn't have… I'm sorry."  
  
Riley felt stunned. Buffy'd had a fit, and now Faith was apologizing? "It's… I'm not mad. You looked like you needed someone to hold you, to be there for you."  
  
"Haven't had much of that." Her voice was soft, almost a whisper.  
  
"Let me help you." The words tumbled out before he could think things over. "You want to do better, let me try to help."  
  
She looked up, almost meeting his eyes. "What's in it for you?"  
  
"Truth, justice, and the American way." The old Superman quote emerged with an almost concealed smile. "Seriously, I want to help you. Because… it's the right thing to do. It's the sort of thing I was raised to do… to be a nice guy."  
  
"You are just… too good to be true." She smiled a little, shaking her head. "What have I got to loose? Sure, go ahead and help me out here. What's our first step?"  
  
"Actually… I hadn't got much farther than trying to convince you to let me help." Riley admitted sheepishly.  
  
She laughed, smiling and looking happier than he'd seen anyone recently. "Great."  
  
End Offer of Help. 


	3. Thinking Time

Faith and Second Chances 3: Thinking Time  
  
author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg/pg13  
  
main characters: Riley, Faith  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
She was sitting in a jeep driving out of town with Buffy's boyfriend. There were all kinds of things wrong with the situation. Like the fact that she really didn't know much about Riley Finn beyond that he had nice arms and liked to cuddle after sex. But could she trust him? Everything was depending on that now. Well, maybe not everything in the world, but her personal future depended on this guy. They guy that she'd allowed to think that she was Buffy.  
  
"I know this has to seem pretty strange to you." He sounded sort of quiet, and Faith wished that she knew if that was his normal sound. "But... I sort of have the idea that things got pretty crazy, and all muddled up, and what you need is some time to think, time to figure out what you want and how to get it."  
  
She closed her eyes, feeling them prickling as a sort of unfamiliar emotion fluttered inside... relief? Her own voice was barely over a whisper, and she wasn't certain if he'd even hear her. "Thanks. Things got... intense, and then I've been out of everything for the last few months... Thinking time could be good."  
  
"Yeah, I figured that things had been pretty busy. Umm..." He'd almost smiled, which was a good expression for him. Made him look all nice and helpful, the great guy next door that never really existed. "There's a guy I know that I figured you could stay with. Just remind him to eat occasionally, he's... well, he's sort of a science geek."  
  
Faith had been a bit worried about this whole idea, about staying with some random guy. Far too often, guys expected 'a little something' as compensation, and she really didn't feel like that sort of thing now. But if this guy was that much of a science geek that he needed someone to remind him to eat, chances were that either he didn't have much interest, or really couldn't get much beyond stammering incoherency around females over fourteen. "Sounds better than just wandering off into the desert or whatever."  
  
"You shouldn't have to be all alone, Faith. Buffy isn't alone, and there's no reason that you have to be." He sounded like he was trying to make her feel better.  
  
Faith looked at him, offering a tiny smile. "Did she ever tell you about the 'stands alone' part of the whole thing?"  
  
"It sort of came up. That was one of the parts that she's ignoring... and there was something about a handbook?" Riley sounded a bit amused. "There's a Slayer's Handbook?"  
  
"Yeah... the thing was written about three hundred years ago by a bunch of stuffy guys who were so wrapped up in theory and wishful thinking that they had no clue about the real world." She chuckled a bit at some of the more unrealistic bits, like proper form and apropriate styles of dress for a Slayer, how 'she should always have properly modest skirts that brush the tops of her shoes'. The memory actually made her smile, remembering how she and Penny had laughed over parts of it. "My Watcher had me use the pages as a guide to reading the old way of writing and then for target practice with throwing knives and axes. She was pretty cool."  
  
"Buffy didn't mention you having a Watcher." Riley sounded like he wasn't certain if he should pry.  
  
"Penny was killed before I got to Sunnydale. B never met her." Faith sighed, wondering for a moment how Penny would have viewed the past two years. She probably would have been disappointed. Penny was always big on responsibility, and the whole idea of saving people, not killing them.  
  
"Oh. So, what are you going to do now? I mean, with the rest of your life?" Riley sounded a bit embarrassed, maybe he felt guilty for reminding her of something unhappy?  
  
Faith shrugged, looking at the little Spanish style house that he was pulling up to. "I really don't know. I figure that I should take a little time to catch up on everything I missed, and sort out everything before I start new stuff. Then maybe once I've got everything figured out… Maybe I can do something right for a change?"  
  
"The way I see it, you helped those people at the church. That was the right thing to do. You didn't do it because someone told you to, or because there was some sort of money to gain, but… well, why did you do it?" Riley looked at her, her face saying that he was fumbling for the right words.  
  
"Because… those guys were doing something wrong. And it wasn't for some big goal, no master plan, it was just… it was stupidity and greed, and it wasn't right at all. Grab a bunch of people, scare them half to death, and demand money… That's not even effectively evil, you know?" Now it was Faith's turn to fumble for the words. There had been such a tangle of feelings when it had happened. Outrage, that people were being held hostage in a church, that there were scared little kids… And there was this sort of scornful disdain at their little efforts of evil. She'd seen real evil, and they weren't even close. "Yeah, it's wrong, and those people were scared, but… they're just the little fish in the sea, the sort that might end up as somebody's minions. And… one of those people sort of reminded me of my aunt, back when I was little. It didn't sit right to see her looking so afraid, and since I could do something to fix it, I just did."  
  
"That's all you can ask, really. In the end, that's what courage really is, just… doing what you think is right, even if it's not safe, or scary." Riley sighed, looking as if he had his own unhappy memories stirring. There was a rough whisper filled with anguish. "Even if the danger wears the face of a friend…"  
  
She looked over, realizing that the guy had some depths to him. She almost wished that she could take the time to explore them. "So, courage is just going ahead with what's right, even if it gets you killed? I guess… well, thanks. I've got a lot of thinking to do, thanks for the chance for a little breathing room during."  
  
And as she listened to Riley explain the short, short version to the guy who's house it was, Faith found herself smiling. Yeah, the guy looked like a sort of skinny guy with floppy hair and this really pale skin, but… things just might be sort of quiet for a while. Time to think, to adjust. And that was enough to ask for right now.  
  
End Thinking Time. 


	4. Question of Faith

author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg/pg13  
  
fourth in 'Faith and Second Chances'  
  
main characters: Riley, Forrest  
  
mention of Riley/Buffy and possibility of Riley/Faith  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
"Man, I've heard of bad break ups, but that Buffy chick seems really torqued about you." Forrest dropped onto the couch near Riley, a frown replacing his usual good humor. "Care to share?"  
  
"It's... complicated. Really complicated." Riley glanced at his friend, wondering if there was any chance that he would be able to escape the messy details.  
  
"Hey, I can follow soap operas and stay awake in a two hour history lecture by Dobbins, I think I can follow the story of 'why Riley and Buffy split up'. Stop trying to delay this." Forrest leaned back, clearly intending to stay until he had answers.  
  
"Well... don't say I didn't warn you." Riley sighed, knowing that his chances of not giving some answers were gone. "And I don't know all the details."  
  
"You don't know all the answers to your own break up?" Forrest shook his head, giving Riley a disappointed look. "Of all people, you should know what happened."  
  
"Buffy's the Slayer. That myth that all the hostiles are scared of? The Slayer's not a myth, she's Buffy. And somehow, there's another one, named Faith. Faith came to town, and something happened that made her go evil, and she and Buffy fought. Faith was in a coma, she woke up, and somehow - that's one of the things I don't know - switched bodies with Buffy. I didn't know that she'd... that they'd..." Riley couldn't quite find the right words to explain this.  
  
"So, Faith looked like Buffy, and Buffy looked like Faith?" Forrest looked fascinated and slightly confused. "So, how's Faith measure up to Buffy in the sack?"  
  
"Well... ummm..." Riley really didn't want to go into that one.  
  
"You did, didn't you? You took your girl to bed, only she wasn't really your girl?" Forrest looked amazed, before understanding dawned. "So that's why she's so pissed off."  
  
"She looked like Buffy! She sounded like Buffy! How was I to know that she wasn't?" Riley defended, feeling rather awkward about the whole thing. "Buffy's decided the whole thing was a terrible betrayal, and she's done with me."  
  
"So, what about this Faith chick? Is she still evil? Is she looking for a guy?" Forrest had this little teasing smirk, and Riley wasn't quite certain how serious he was.  
  
Scowling at Forrest, Riley almost growled. "Faith is not evil, she's just... confused. She doesn't need anyone chasing her towards a bed, especially not someone who's just playing around."  
  
"Defensive? Calm down, I was just teasing." Forrest raised his hands, as if gesturing surrender. "So, is she as hot as Buffy?"  
  
With a smile, Riley let himself think of Faith, with her dark hair and those eyes, so full of emotions. "Yeah..."  
  
"Ahhh, I see how it is now." Forrest chuckled. "So, since it doesn't look like you want to get back with Buffy, that mean she's fair game for the rest of us guys? I know Tompkins was saying that she had a nice set of legs."  
  
"Tompkins? He'd never be... well, it wouldn't last. But if someone else wants to try... I'm not going to stand in their way." Riley sighed, feeling as if there was something wrong with the whole Buffy-twist to the conversation. "Why are you asking me? Buffy's not a toy to be passed around, or a prize to win. If someone want to try, go for it, but it might not work."  
  
"Fair enough, man." Forrest shrugged. "She's not my type, but she is pretty. I just hope that Faith doesn't mess up your work like Buffy did."  
  
"Faith? But... I'm not involved with Faith." Riley sputtered.  
  
"Not yet, you mean." Forrest sounded almost amused. "That's the same sappy look you got back when you were calling Buffy peculiar. You may not be getting it on, but you like her, and you want her."  
  
"She's not ready for something like that." Riley muttered, staring at his shoe. "She needs to sort out the last couple years, figure out where things went wrong and how to keep it from happening again. Then, maybe she might be ready for a guy in her life."  
  
Forrest nodded, as if something had been confirmed. "You want to be the guy when she's ready."  
  
"Absolutely." Riley didn't even hesitate. "She's... I can't explain it, but there's this pull. It's not love, but... She wants to be a better person, to do the right thing. And I want to be there, helping her remember what's right, helping her face her demons."  
  
"Inner demons?" Forrest stood up, one hand tucking the pocket lining back into his pants. "Or the nastier hostiles that can bite everyone else?"  
  
"Both." He barely whispered the word, feeling like the world's biggest sap as it emerged.  
  
"Too much of the wholesome midwest in you, Finn. You sound like the old Superman comics - truth, justice, and the American way. If you weren't my friend, you'd be the guy we all picked on for being mushy." Forrest was definitely laughing at him now.  
  
"Yeah, but Superman always wins, even if he doesn't get the girl." Riley commented, trying to smile.  
  
"Faith doesn't sound like she needs a Superman in her life." Forrest seemed to have gone a little more serious.  
  
"So I'll be Batman. I know what's out there, I know she has to deal with it, and I can try to help." Pausing to think about the old Batman comics that he'd read, Riley grinned. "But I don't sit brooding in a cave."  
  
"Here I thought that the chicks went for that sort of thing?" Forrest was definitely teasing now.  
  
"Right..." Laughing, Riley shook his head. "Brooding goes better with dark hair anyhow."  
  
"True. You'd never be able to pull it off if you tried." Forrest just laughed, sauntering towards the door. "Let's just hope everything works out better for you and Faith than things did for Batman and Catwoman."  
  
end Faith and Second Chances 4: Question of Faith. 


	5. Faith and Grieving

Faith and Second Chances 5: Faith in Grieving  
  
author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg/pg13  
  
main characters: Riley, Faith  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
Faith had been able to get plenty of thinking done over the past couple weeks. Steve had also been able to help her catch up on recent events, although the price for that was listening to him explain everything almost to death with his long rambles about political motivation, potential ecological impact, and what sort of opportunities were opened in research by everything. She'd also learned far more than she'd ever even known existed about sci-fi movies and television shows, and all his reasons why Picard had been a better Captain than Kirk, and how Janeway was an ineffective field commander and should have been plunked in charge of a research facility somewhere.  
  
Overall, she still figured it was better than a coma. Most of the time.  
  
But she couldn't stay here forever. Especially since Steve could get really annoying when he started in on some pet theory or series obsession. Granted, she'd been forced to admit that the Psicorps were nasty and Bester was freaky, but if she had to stay here long term... Well, she probably would be able to manage not to kill him to get some quiet. She'd ended up encouraging him to go 'work on something in the lab' an awful lot though.  
  
It was more interesting when he talked about his projects for the Initiative. About designing and upgrading weapons to fight demons, and discussing the field reports brought back by some of the team members. He had mentioned that the reports from Riley's team were particularly detailed about how well things worked on demons.  
  
Riley Finn... everybody's favorite Initiative soldier. He was good looking, had left a good impression after that sleeping-with-her-as-Buffy experience, and seemed to be a decent guy. He even knew about vamps and demons. He'd been on her mind a lot lately, and not all of it had been thoughts of Riley the Nice Guy.  
  
From the front of the house, she heard the doorbell ring and the sound of Steve shuffling towards it. Faith shook her head as she dropped slices of roast beef and Swiss cheese onto a bun. "I got to get a grip on myself."  
  
"Riley!" Steve sounded delighted, making Faith wonder if he had any idea how obvious it was that Riley had become his personal hero. "Nice to see you, can I offer you a sandwich? Coffee?"  
  
"I thought maybe I could check on Faith." Riley's voice sounded a bit funny, almost tired.  
  
"In the kitchen. Steve may be great with electronics and high tech toys, but the man can ruin boiled eggs." Faith had raised her voice a little, just enough that the guys would hear her.  
  
"I'm not that bad!" Steve tried to protest. After a few moments of silence, he conceded "Well, maybe I am."  
  
Faith emerged from the kitchen, looking at the pair of them. Steve was there, dressed as usual in a pair of baggy jeans and a shirt with a picture of one of the Babylon Five guys on it, hovering nervously. Riley looked… well, he was in a pair of closer fitting jeans and a plain white tee shirt, and looked like he'd been drug facedown through a brawl. There was dust clinging to his pants and to the sweat that had beaded up all over his face, neck and shoulders, and his eyes looked bloodshot and dark ringed. His knuckles were raw looking, as if he'd been hitting a wall repeatedly. "Riley… what happened?"  
  
"Forrest's dead." The funny sound was more obvious this time as a combination of exhaustion and emotional overload.  
  
"Damn… what happened?" Faith took his arm, towing him over to the couch, pushing him to sit down, ignoring the crinkling sound of the scattered pages of notes and technical diagrams.  
  
"Walsh had us looking for this demon… something called a Polgara. It has this bone spike that it can extend from it arms. We were warned about that in the briefing, and then we all went out hunting." He paused, although it wasn't clear if it was from exhaustion of his emotions. "We heard something, and spread out a little to look for the source of the noise. Forrest found it, and then… That bone spike just… right into his stomach. He died right there, all because of some damn demon."  
  
Faith ran her hand up and down his arm, trying to help sooth him. "Riley… I know how much that sort of thing hurts. The pain of loosing someone that you care about. But you're not doing yourself any good by pushing yourself this hard. Have you slept since then?"  
  
"No. Every time I close my eyes, I see him, clutching at his stomach, that shocked look on his face as the blood just… My God, Faith, there was so much blood." Riley shook his head, his eyes pleading as he looked at her. "How could we have… how did we loose him like that?"  
  
"Because sometimes life just bites. Bad things happen, you find out that your life has just been hijacked by destiny, the people that you care about die horribly… And you just have to keep going." Faith blinked away tears, remembering Penny. "This is the only life we've got, we just have to try to make the best of it."  
  
"That's it? We just have to go on?" Riley looked at her, his eyes full of pain.  
  
"Well, finding the demon responsible and kicking their ass is sort of theraputic, but you still… it won't bring him back." Faith tried to smile, but it didn't quite work. "And you remember them, and you mourn for them."  
  
Riley's arms had gone around her, and he clung to her, as if she was some sort of protection from the pain of life. Faith slid one arm behind him, holding him tightly. "It's okay to miss him, Riley. It's okay to hurt."  
  
Faith held Riley as he shook, and eventually the tears flowed from his eyes as his whole body shook. It was as if the emotions were clawing their way out, and he was left in an exhausted heap, slumped against her and fast asleep.  
  
Awkwardly, Faith managed to get up from the couch, and lifted him into her arms. "Quite the big guy, aren't you? Steve, can you make sure the door's open to the spare room? I'm thinking he could use a little bed rest."  
  
"You're… wow. You have no idea how impressive that looks." Steve blinked, getting this sort of goofy smile as he looked at her. "I'll just go make sure the door's open."  
  
Faith followed him, and gently laid Riley on the bed. He looked so vulnerable like that. "Get some rest, soldier. We've got you covered for now."  
  
End Faith and Second Chances 5: Faith in Grieving. 


	6. How to Go on?

Faith and Second Chances 6: How to Go On?  
  
author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg13  
  
main characters: Riley, Faith  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
  
  
* * * *  
  
When Riley first woke up, he couldn't figure out where he was. He was on a bed, but it didn't smell like his dorm room, the shadows didn't fall in the right places, and there was the faint sound of something whirring outside of the room. He blinked, his whole body feeling stiff and gritty, and tried to think back.  
  
Forrest was dead.  
  
Riley shuddered, and curled inwards, his knees coming up over his stomach and his arms curling around them. Forrest was dead, all because of some stupid demons. All because they hadn't been careful enough. His friend was dead. He closed his eyes as the horrible scene replayed itself, and tried to ignore the fact that the bed sheet under his cheek and eye was growing damp.  
  
"Hey in there. Feel up to some coffee? Maybe some orange juice?" Faith's voice called into the room.  
  
Raising his head slightly, he could see her in the doorway. Grimacing, he asked. "Is there an option of just shoot me now?"  
  
For a moment, Faith tensed, and then she entered the room. "No, there isn't. The only person in this house with a tendency to shoot people is you, and you didn't bring any of your toys with you."  
  
"Faith..." Riley blinked, remembering a bit of what he'd learned of her past. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean..."  
  
"You meant that you feel bad, and wish that it was over, that the pain would stop." She sat beside him, her hand resting on his shoulder. "I get that, I really do. But it takes time."  
  
"How long?" He looked at her, wondering what sort of answer Faith would have.  
  
She had a sad smile as she wiped his forehead with a scrap of cloth. "A long time. I lost... I lost someone who'd become my second mother. It still hurts, but not quite as bad. More like a bone deep bruise than being cut down to the bone now. But.... it's getting better. Eventually, loosing Forrest won't hurt as bad."  
  
"And in the mean time?" Riley looked at her, noticing the way that she seemed so comfortable, so relaxed.  
  
"In the mean time... go take a shower, you stink." She smiled, standing up and offering a hand.   
  
Riley took her hand, half expecting her to fall onto the bed with him, which wouldn't precisely be a bad thing. Instead, he was pulled to his feet. The sheer strength that it required reminded him that Faith, like Buffy, was a Slayer. "Okay, a shower it is."  
  
"Absolutely. Take a shower, we'll see if we can find you something clean." Faith teased, giving him a gentle push towards the bathroom.  
  
He shuffled towards the door, pausing to look back at her. "So, eventually, this will be easy?"  
  
"What sort of drugs are you on, soldier boy?" Faith looked at him, one eyebrow raised as she folded her arms just under her breasts. "This is life. Life is never easy, unless you're a plant. It won't be easy, but it will be easier."  
  
"Damn. Here I was hoping that one day, I'd wake up and everything would be simple. I'd be able to tell the bad guys from the good guys at a glance, I'd know all the answers, and nobody..." Riley faltered, the rest of the words that Buffy had once used echoing in his mind 'and nobody ever dies.'  
  
Faith shook her head. "Sorry. I'd like that too. No more mistakes, no more regrets... No more painful losses."  
  
"I guess..." Riley paused, trying to figure out how a life like that could even happen. "It'll never happen, will it?"  
  
"Nope." She sighed, and put one hand on her hip. "You go shower, I'll have Steve make the coffee and I'll throw you together some food."  
  
"You can cook?" Riley blinked, a half smile on his lips.  
  
"Better than Steve." She lifted her chin for a moment, a teasing smile firmly in place. "But that's not saying much. Don't expect anything fancy. It'll be hot, but not fancy."  
  
"For today, hot's good enough." Riley turned, going into the bathroom. It was starting to feel like he might be able to move on, to continue to survive, despite the pain. And a good share of it was from Faith's help. Huh. Hadn't this started because he'd wanted to help her?  
  
end How to Go On? 


	7. Settling the Score

author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg13  
  
main characters: Riley, Faith  
  
Faith and Second Chances 7: Settling A Score  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
Lunch ended up being grilled cheese sandwiches and some vegetable soup from a couple cans. Hardly the top of the line cuisine, but it was hot and filling. For a while, there was only the sounds of chewing, clinking spoons, and people drinking their coffee.  
  
"The thing that did it... I want to kill it. I want to make certain that it can't ever... that nobody else will die." Riley's voice was grim, filled with pain.  
  
"It won't... it won't bring him back." Steve's voice was soft, hesitant.  
  
"No, but it might help with some of the emotions." Riley sighed, and leaned on his elbow. "It won't bring Forrest back, but...I guess maybe it's revenge."  
  
Faith shook her head, and looked over at Riley and his sad eyes. "Nothing wrong with a bit of revenge in this case. I'll make you a deal - try to get some decent food in you, loosen those muscles up a bit, and then we can go out tonight to find this Polgara and kick it's ass."  
  
Riley smiled at her, this sad little smile that was so much less that what his smiles should be. "That sounds good, Faith."  
  
Faith shook her head again, biting her lip as she tried to tell herself that it didn't hurt to see that broken smile, the pain in his eyes. She tried to tell herself that he didn't matter... And Faith knew that she was trying to lie to herself. She couldn't put it into words, but somehow, Riley mattered. She cared that he was upset, and wanted to see him better. It gave her this fuzzy feeling inside that he'd been checking on her regularly, that when something happened, he talked to her about it.  
  
She didn't know how either of them managed to get through the day. Neither one seemed to be able to really relax, and the demon and Forrest were both topics too painful to discuss, and at the same time, taking up too much of Riley's attention to let him talk about anything else. So they paced, and stretched a bit, and managed to get a little bit of dinner in the way of slices of lunch meat on bread, washed down by some weird blended fruit juice that Steve had. Riley wanted to get that demon, and Faith wanted to make sure that the demon didn't get Riley.  
  
By the time the sun was barely touching the horizon, not quite dusk, they decided that it was late enough to stop bothering to pretend that they could wait. Riley picked up his belt, brushed the side of his tazer as if removing some trace or shadow of dust. Faith picked up one of the little crossbows, a couple good knives, and a wooden stake, wanting to be prepared for almost anything. Riley was tense as he walked to his jeep, clearly impatient to find this Polgara and start with the vengeance.  
  
They sat in tense silence as he drove them near the section of trees and hills that the demon had been lurking at before. Riley's walkie talkie sputtered static at him, and he picked it up, listening for a few moments before speaking. "Yes, I'm ready to attempt to locate the Polgara."  
  
"I won't let it affect my performance, Sir."  
  
"Yes, everything is in order." Frowning, Riley clicked a button, and practically slammed the device into a belt loop. "Worried about my performance. Ha! Concerned about morale...Ha! He's just worried that all of this will end up getting him a negative performance evaluation."  
  
"Who thinks that?" Faith glanced over, wondering if Riley realized that his one hand was clenching the steering wheel almost tight enough to bend it, and the other was shaking as it hovered near but not touching the wheel.  
  
"There's... the guy in charge of the Initiative soldiers, not the scientists. He's... He's more worried about his future reports than about us." Riley's voice had this sort of tremor to it that suggested he was holding back emotion by an effort of will.  
  
Faith reached over, catching hold of his hand, and stilling the tremors. "Riley. It's going to... well, We're going to find it, we're going to kick it's ass. I'm not planning to let you get hurt, and I don't plan to get hurt either. We can do this."  
  
His smile was weak, but it was obvious to Faith that he appreciated the effort to help him feel better. "Let's get on with it then."  
  
They stepped out of the jeep, and began to move towards the caves, muscles tense and nerves alert for the slightest noise. It must have been dozens of times that one of them jumped from a squirrel moving, or a strong breeze rattling leaves. Eventually, there was another noise, a sort of shuffling sound, like clumsy feet over loose earth. There was the faintest of shadows, a tall, lean shape with a lumpy head. Faith could feel the prickle that whispered 'demon' to her slayer senses, and that feeling that reminded her of putting her hand near a fire that spoke of evil/danger.  
  
Nodding, Faith pulled her knife, the crossbow already loaded and prepared to fire. The thing moved a little more, now partly visible though the tall weeds and the low branches, and she fired a bolt towards the scaly figure. It snarled in pain, and rushed towards them. But they were ready for this, had expected it to react like that. Faith twisted to the side, the blade of her knife slicing along the ribs in a curve, glancing off of two ribs. Riley tried to shoot it with the tazer, but the little dartlette skittered off the Polgara's skin. Cursing, Riley started the reset procedure and swung the barrel at the bone spike that extended from the hand. There was a sort of knocking sound, and the arm raised, the creature snarled again, and turned towards Riley.  
  
Faith took advantage of the distraction, launching a spinning kick towards it's head, the knife blade also flashing out towards the back of it's knee. If she could hamstring it, it would fall, or at least be less able to fight.  
  
Riley slammed the butt of the gun into the Polgara's jaw, his face twisted into an expression of pain and rage. It was obvious that he wanted to make it hurt for killing Forrest.  
  
"Electrocute it already!" Faith called, kicking at the lower back, hoping that it wouldn't be able to... Swearing, she half fell backwards as it twisted, stabbing the bone spike towards her leg. She actually felt it slice through her pants, and it barely parted the skin of her leg, hardly drawing blood.  
  
Riley fired the tazer again, and this time the dart landed in the slice along the ribcage, making a soft sucking sound as it connected. Of course, that was right before the frantic hum that was the surge of electricity, ad the sizzle and scream of the demon as the electricity surged into the open wound.  
  
After a few moment, the Polgara collapsed, almost looking like slow motion. The tazer had a blinking light on the side and no more current flowing down the wire, and Riley still glared at it.  
  
"It's down." Faith grinned, feeling oddly better despite her slashed pants and scraped leg. "Call it in, and then we can stop at Denny's or something. You know, eat someone else's cooking for once."  
  
Riley stopped, still glaring at the fallen demon and breathing heavily. "Right." He fumbled for the walkie-talkie, and almost dropped it when he got it free from his belt. "Agent Lilac to... someone. I need a unit for pick-up."  
  
Faith tried not to laugh as she listened. Agent Lilac? Lilac? Why on earth would Riley's codename be... She managed to keep the giggles confined until he was fumbling the radio back to his belt. "Lilac..."  
  
"It's not..." Riley protested, looking right at her before getting a hint of a smile. "Well, maybe it is a bit funny."  
  
Faith kept giggling, and walked over to stand beside him and look at the fallen demon. "It's down, we beat it. Even if you do have a silly codename. Now, as soon as someone shows up to get rid of it, we can go have some dinner, and a nice slice of pie. With coffee for you and a soda for me."  
  
Riley wrapped one arm around her shoulders, pulling her close for a rough hug. "Yeah, dinner. We just... just go on. One day at a time, you said."  
  
"Yeah." Faith let herself relax a bit, enjoying the feeling of Riley's body next to hers. "oh, wait, where did that crossbow go? I dropped it when I kicked at his lumpy head..."  
  
Eventually, the crossbow was recovered, and some other guys showed up to haul away the demon, who'd somehow got kicked a couple more times for good measure. Riley swore that he'd seen it moving each time. And then, it was time for some food.  
  
That would take care of half of the post-slaying cravings at least. As for the rest... well, rushing into things had got her into trouble before, she should try to take things a bit slower this time. Even if it was frustrating.  
  
end F&SC7: Settling the Score. 


	8. I Just Wish

author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg13  
  
main characters: Riley, Faith  
  
Faith and Second Chances 8: I Just Wish...  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
Riley had suggested that she might feel better if she got out for a while, spent the day out in the sunshine, away from Steve and his projects and obsessive sci-fi monologs. Considering the way that the place was starting to feel like it was closing in on her, Faith had leapt or the chance. She hadn't even considered the idea that there could be any danger – it was daytime, the sun was out, life was good. And the Watcher's Council operative who'd been sent to drag her back to England and face the Council were long gone. Time out sounded like just the thing to make life less stressful for both of them.  
  
Riley wasn't happy, but there wasn't any reason to expect him to be happy. One of his best friends had been killed in front of him. It hadn't been that long since he'd split up with B, and Faith was still certain that she'd had some responsibility for that. She couldn't quite put it into words, but there were times that he just seemed a bit off, like something else was wrong.  
  
As for herself, she'd been spending a lot of time thinking about her life. Thinking about the choices that she'd made, the ways that she'd reacted to things. Sometimes, she'd done the only thing that she'd thought was an option at the time. Looking back, there were times when there had been other options, she just hadn't seen them. She'd ended up hostile and defensive when she'd got to Sunnydale, and it hadn't helped her any. Instead of protecting her, it had left her isolated and vulnerable to Dick and his plans. She could see how everything had played right into his hands…  
  
Faith wished that she could understand everything, make things simple again. But she couldn't make everything go back, not for Riley, not for herself. The ones that they'd lost were still gone, and would stay that way. Mistakes would stay made, though it might be possible to try to fix or at least make up for some of them. This was her second... well, her third chance for things, she should really try to do better this time around.  
  
"I'm sorry about this. Not that it was my fault, but... I feel for you." She leaned against Riley, her head resting on his arm as they looked out at the campus. She was watching the people move along, envying the fact that they could sleep at night, that they wouldn't be plagued by nightmares about monsters and memory. Or maybe they would be... there were all sorts of monsters.  
  
"I know." Riley glanced at her, and sighed, not quite managing a smile. "It feels better to know that the Polgara's been taken in, but..."  
  
"He's still gone." She finished for him, knowing that it was harder to say those words than to hear them.  
  
"Yeah. I just wish... I just wish he was back, that I could see him again. Even if only to say goodbye." Riley paused, and glanced at his feet, or maybe just away from her. "Does that make any sense at all?"  
  
"Makes perfect sense to me." She offered, remembering the raw pain of her Watcher's death, remembering the many times that she'd turned, wanting to ask a question, or get an observation, only to be reminded that Penny was gone.  
  
"I'm supposed to be grading essays for Professor Walsh. Three to five pages on the use of negative reinforcement." He glanced again at his briefcase, still closed and untouched from the place that he'd dropped it an hour ago when they'd sat down.  
  
Faith resisted the urge to giggle at his slightly mournful expression. When he'd explained that a lot of the soldiers had positions on the campus to maintain their cover, she'd thought it was amusing. Especially since his 'cover' was the Teacher's Assistant to a Psychology Professor that had the firm belief that writing papers about a thing would help students learn. Teasing just a little she commented, "Well, you should have known that would go with being a TA."   
  
"I didn't volunteer for this. I don't get paid enough to grade those with a smile." His foot kicked the briefcase, causing it to rock slightly, toppling after it hit his foot again.  
  
"They can't be that bad." She looked at him, wondering how much was grief, how much was the desire to be hunting demons instead, and how much was the essays really being that bad.  
  
With a noise like strangled laughter, he turned, one hand touching her cheek lightly. "Yes, they can. I'll show you how bad they can be."  
  
Faith grinned, and leaned slightly into his touch. Then, her stomach made a little gurgling sound, and she could feel her cheeks growing warm. "How about over... or maybe after lunch?"  
  
"You're hungry again? After that huge breakfast?" Riley looked at her with exaggerated surprise. Glancing at his watch, he sat up a bit at the time. "Oh. I hadn't realized that it was so late. Lunch would be good then."  
  
"Yeah, lunch." Faith stood up, offering him a hand. "And you're supposed to be the smart, organized one... It's past time for food!"  
  
He let her help him to his feet, grabbing the briefcase as he stood. They started walking towards one of the little restaurants, and slowed, shoulders slumping, and the trace of sparkle left his eyes. "Forrest loved that little Italian place. How am I just supposed to go on like nothing's changed when he's gone?"  
  
"Falling apart won't bring him back. And you can't start yelling at all the people, trying to tell them what's out there, to be careful." Faith sighed, remembering having an argument like that with her Watcher. "If you try, they won't believe you. You'll be that crazy person who believes in monsters, or the paranoid wacko that they go to the other side of the street to avoid."  
  
"Ouch." Riley shook his head, glancing at her. "That wouldn't help... did you try that?"  
  
"No." The word slipped out as Faith remembered. Her mom had been worried when Penny had first arrived, first talked about Faith having a destiny. But when she'd seen the first monster, her mom had freaked out. She'd started trying so hard to keep the monsters away that people had thought she was loosing her mind. She'd become jumpy, even more nervous than before. And when she'd started trying to warn the neighbors... Well, they hadn't attacked her mom, but they'd started talking more. About the crazy lady that thought the monsters were out to get her. Soon, her mom was known as Loony Laney, and everyone laughed about her fears, both behind her back and to her face.  
  
"Faith?" Riley's voice sounded worried, making Faith wonder just how many times he'd said her name trying to reclaim her attention.  
  
"Sorry. I was just... there's a lot of memories." She didn't want to explain, didn't want to tell him everything. Not right now, not when everything was so raw for him, and she was still trying to figure out how to... well, how to live a life that wouldn't have made Penny ashamed.  
  
Riley nodded, his eyes darkening once more with memories and pain of his own. "Yeah. So... You didn't answer my question. What about Italian?"  
  
"Italian's fine." She reached out, resting her hand on his arm. "Riley? It'll get easier."  
  
"I hope so." He murmured, and the two of them went inside.  
  
end F&2ndC 8: I Just Wish... 


	9. Prodding at the Wounds

author: Lucinda  
  
rating: pg13  
  
main characters: Riley, Faith, Buffy  
  
Faith and Second Chances 9: Prodding at the Wounds  
  
disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer  
  
distribution: TNL, Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.  
  
set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.  
  
Lunch had been good, pasta and vegetables at the Italian place. She'd listened as Riley talked about Forrest, thing that they'd done together. About basketball behind the dorm building, and hanging out at the movie theater, or the way that Forrest would go from girlfriend to girlfriend, like a finicky butterfly. She'd laughed at the description, and at the way that Riley had said everyone else had teased him about it. But at least Riley was remembering Forrest the way that he'd lived, instead of the way that he'd died.  
  
Honestly, it was one of the better days that she'd had in a long time. Nice weather, nobody trying to kill her, no panicked efforts to find and slay... Life was almost good. Part of her was wondering what would spoil it.  
  
"Riley? What are you doing with her?" Buffy's voice was filled with hostility and dismay. And the way she'd made the word 'her' sound... It was as if she couldn't think of a word vile enough to use.  
  
"Buffy?" Riley had the slightly shocked look that reminded Faith of a deer caught in headlights. "I didn't expect to see you here."  
  
Putting one hand on her hip, Buffy looked at them, her eyes narrowing. "Why are you here with Faith? She's not... I'd think you'd have something better to do."  
  
"It was time for lunch." Riley was trying to keep a level voice, but Faith could se the anger in his eyes. "And I see no reason why Faith can't have lunch with me."  
  
"Moving on already? Or is it that you're just that lonely?" Buffy was glaring at Faith now, her eyes glittering with emotion.  
  
"B, it was pasta and vegetables in public, not a floor show." Faith reminded herself that she wasn't supposed to get into fights with humans. That Buffy wasn't something to Slay, no matter how frustrating she found the other Slayer.  
  
"Shouldn't you be somewhere else, locked up?" Buffy sniped, the hand not on her hip curling into a fist.  
  
Riley glanced from Faith to Buffy and back again. "Buffy, you broke up with me, not the other way around. If I want to take Faith out for lunch, it's not your business anymore. It wouldn't be any of your business if I kissed her, or if we were sleeping together, because you and I aren't dating anymore."  
  
"I'm surprised you aren't spending time with your soldier buddies." Buffy looked at Riley, apparently deciding to ignore Faith. "Or are they just as disappointed by your new honey as I am?"  
  
Riley sucked in a breath, the briefcase falling from hands gone suddenly limp. "Forrest is dead. Graham's got a class right now. I think that you've said enough."  
  
"Riley, I..." Buffy looked shocked, and almost apologetic. "I didn't know."  
  
Faith knelt down, picking up the case so that she wouldn't try to hit Buffy. It was amazing how that blond could go from pit bull to sweetheart in the blink of an eye. Which Buffy was the real one? Or were they both a mask? And most importantly, why had they had the bad luck to run into her today?  
  
"Maybe you didn't." Riley spoke slowly, as if he was rejecting a dozen words for each one that came out. "But your words were very rude and hurtful. And I don't know why you care, considering the way you ended things."  
  
"Riley, maybe we should go. I don't think she's very happy with either of us." Faith tried to keep her words quiet, tried to keep the anger that she felt under wraps.  
  
Riley looked over, and a small smile melted some of the anger from his eyes. His hand reached out, resting over hers on the handle of the briefcase. "Yeah, I get that feeling too."  
  
Faith smiled back, just a tiny upturn of her lips, and they started to walk away from the little restaurant. Faith had the feeling that things weren't over, that Buffy wouldn't just stop. After all, Buffy had never liked the idea of another Slayer in the town, the idea of that other Slayer - one who'd turned into an enemy, no less - with her boyfriend... Okay, ex-boyfriend, but the point was that it would still probably be infuriating to Buffy.  
  
"I think she's disappointed that I'm not off rotting in some jail cell." Faith muttered.  
  
Riley shrugged. "I don't think that she likes you." His thumb slid over her hand, almost a little caress. "But I'm glad that you're here."  
  
"I'm... well, I'd rather be here with you than off in a cell. But I don't think..." Faith took a deep breath, wondering why her chest felt so tight. "I'm a Slayer. There isn't a retirement program, and the Council... They're not happy about me."  
  
"Buffy had said a little about the things that you did. Back when we were dating that is. I can see why the Council would be unhappy." For a few moments, Riley was quiet. "They don't sound very big on second chances."  
  
"No, they aren't." Faith sighed, part of her wishing that she could just fling herself into his arms and sob as he magically fixed all of her problems. But that sort of thing only happened in romance novels and movies, not real life. "Of course, they aren't big on independent thought either."  
  
"What do they want then? Someone who follows all the rules, kills things, salutes, and always eats their peas?" Riley asked, one eyebrow raising a little.  
  
"Yeah. Well, I don't know about the saluting, but that sums things up." Faith snickered a bit. "Of course, I don't salute except with only one finger, and I burned the rulebook."  
  
"There's actually a rulebook?" Riley sounded surprised. "What about the peas?"  
  
"Put a little butter on them and they're fine." Faith muttered, and then chuckled. "Forget the peas, they aren't important. Of course there's a rulebook, the Council's mostly run by stuffy British guys. There has to be a rulebook. It's about the size of that Psych book that you were using as a coffee coaster this morning."  
  
Riley started to chuckle. He kept glancing over at her, and then he'd snicker a little more. Eventually, he was laughing so hard that he wasn't quite walking straight.  
  
Faith pulled him to a stop, and looked at him. "Riley... Not that it's bad to see you laughing instead of moping, but what's so damn funny?"  
  
"You flip people off instead of saluting, burned the rulebook, went to the Dark Side, but you eat your peas?" He gasped the words out as he laughed.  
  
Faith blinked, and then smiled. "I guess it does sound kind of funny when you put it like that."  
  
Maybe the afternoon wasn't completely shot. Not if he could laugh, even if it was sort of at her. Especially not since it was something that she could laugh along with, and he'd pretty much told Buffy off. Not particularly rudely, but still... She'd enjoy it while it lasted.  
  
end F&2ndC 9: Prodding at the Wounds. 


	10. That Sinking Sensation

author: Lucinda

rating: pg13

main characters: Riley, Faith, Graham Miller

Faith and Second Chances 10: That Sinking Sensation

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.

Riley was sitting with Faith, watching birds flutter around the open field. They'd decided to have lunch again today, partly in hopes of removing the bitter taste of the encounter with Buffy - and what made her think she had any rights to him now? She'd broken up with him, nearly broken his hand doing that, and stormed out of his room. Too bad she hadn't just stormed out of his life altogether.

"Hey, stop thinking bout B." Faith said, her hand swatting lightly against his arm, just enough to make him notice, but not enough to hurt.

"Sorry, it's just..." Riley tried to find the words. "She has no claim on me now, so why does she care?"

"Because, once you're hers, you're hers forever. Didn't she mention that part?" Faith's voice didn't quite hide the painful undertones. "You can't have your life back afterwards."

"That doesn't work for me." He muttered, plucking a blade of grass.

"Riley?" Graham's voice caught his attention.

"Miller, what brings you here? I thought you were trying to talk to that pretty girl at the computer lab?" He wondered if it was coincidence, or if Graham had been looking for him.

"It's..." Graham glanced at Faith, and tensed slightly. "It's complicated."

Riley blinked, and then realized that Graham probably meant that it connected to Initiative matters. "If it's work related and not too technical, Faith might be able to offer some useful ideas."

"Really?" Graham sounded doubtful. "Here's not a good place to talk about it."

Riley stood up, unsurprised that Faith managed to rise as quickly and more gracefully, and brushed the back of his pants off. "Lead on to somewhere we can talk then."

His mind tried to figure out the possible complications. Another escape? Computer failure? Some sort of equipment damage? Illness carried by one of the hostiles?

Graham brought them to a rather worn looking shelter, really just a roof over some support poles with some picnic tables underneath. Turning around to face them, he stuffed his fists into his pockets. "Forrest... his body's missing."

"When you say missing..." Riley couldn't quite finish. How could a body be missing? Forrest was dead, not a vampire, he wouldn't get up and walk away.

"Where was the body?" Faith's voice was soft. "Had there been a funeral, or was he being kept in a morgue?"

"We have a morgue. He's not there, and there's no record to say that he ever was." Graham admitted, his eyes full of painful confusion. "I... I wanted to say goodbye."

Riley blinked, his mind just grinding to a painful halt. "Gone? But... the records..."

Faith sat on one of the tables, one foot pulled up. She looked as if her thoughts were very unhappy. "This morgue... It's in your soldier-boy complex, right? Secured location and all of that?"

"That's right." Riley agreed, glancing from Faith to Graham. "Why? What are you thinking?"

"If the morgue where he was put is inside your perimeter, then anything going after the body would have to be inside the base first. You'd know if any big nasties charged in, and they probably wouldn't know where to look." Faith seemed to be partly thinking out loud, and partly trying to tow them along her line of thought.

"Yes." Riley nodded. "So you're saying...

"She's saying that whatever happened to the body, the person responsible was already inside." Graham's voice was soft.

"Yeah." Faith nodded. "But that still leaves the question of who and why."

Riley blinked and swallowed hard as things started to make a very ugly sort of sense. "Who has the clearance to have bodies moved? Who can get into the computer and delete records like that?"

Graham paled, and sat down. "But... are you saying that... one of our bosses ordered Forrest's body to be... Why?"

"Good question. I don't have any answers for you." Faith muttered. "You're sure that it couldn't just be for an autopsy, or maybe cremation?"

"If that was all, why delete the records?" Graham asked.

"We have a doctor who takes care of injuries or autopsies. She would have said something if..." Riley couldn't quite continue, feeling suddenly sick at the whole messy tangle of thought.

"So, someone's got a secret project going? Or just an unauthorized one?" Faith whispered.

Riley looked at them, seeing that Graham looked just as sick as he felt, and Faith didn't look happy about it either. "We have to find out."

"I just think the answers are going to be ugly." Faith murmured.

"Yeah."

end Faith and Second Chances 10: That Sinking Sensation.


	11. Dark Clues

author: Lucinda

rating: pg13

main characters: Riley, Fenner, Dr. Walsh

Faith and Second Chances 11:

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Fenner is mine.

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.

"You're sure the guy was brought here, not to one of the local parlors?" Fenner asked, his short hair somehow still managing to look wild and unkempt.

"I'm sure." Riley reminded himself to remain calm, trying not to show that he had any emotional stake in his questioning. "The soldier - Forrest Gates - was killed in the field, by one of the HST's. It was a bit too much to try to pass of and explain away, so he came in here. Now, thanks to a couple of the stun-guns not getting recharged properly, I'm stuck making certain all the forms for deceased soldiers have been properly filed."

"Ah. Glad I don't get passed into other areas for problems. Then again, mine don't generally get up and try to walk away." He nodded to himself, and rubbed over his knuckles, eyes going unfocused. "But I can't remember all the names, do you have a picture, or a description?"

"Yeah." Riley could feel his throat getting tight as he produced a photo of Forrest. "He was on my team."

"Ahh, yes. He was the one with the chest wound." Fenner nodded, and pulled a deck of half crumpled file cards from one pocket. "No way that could be passed of as wild dogs. He should be in... give me a moment..." He pointed to the left side of the row of morgue drawers, "Right in drawer number fifteen."

Riley could feel his hands shaking as they slid the drawer open. There was the large black body bag, but something didn't look quite right. Riley desperately wanted Graham to be wrong, or for Forrest to have just been out for something, an autopsy, or... anything. He reached out, and pressed lightly on it, right about where he guessed Forrest's stomach should be.

The bag flattened, the sort of flat that makes it clear that there's nothing solid or even substantial inside.

"What the hell?" Fenner moved over, pulling the zipper open and glaring at the inside of the bag. There were some bloodstains, and a powerful and unpleasant smell, but no body. No body parts. "What the hell... he's supposed to be in there."

Fenner moved over to the computer, and his fingers stabbed at the keys, moving rapidly. After a few tense moments, he swore again. "Fucking hell. He's not in the system. My computer says the drawer's been empty all month, since that big blue thing with the scales. I can not believe someone could lose a damn body and the computer records for it. Some paperwork a bit behind, yeah, but the whole damn file?"

He typed a bit more, and paled slightly. "Shit. There's no record of him even dying. He had his medical at the end of the month, got the vitamins refilled, and then nothing. Just regular assignment at the start of the month that he's remaining on Alpha team. This is seriously fucked up. It must have happened on one of the other shifts."

"Do you normally get informed when the bodies are removed on other shifts?" Riley asked, feeling lightheaded and full of a feeling that he couldn't define, but it felt like his insides were full of killer bees in a windstorm.

"There's a form that's supposed to be filled out for any of the soldiers. Different one for the HST's if the whole body's taken." Fenner shrugged, and then started typing something else, muttering to himself.

"The whole body? As opposed to what, just an arm?" Riley blurted, unwholesome images dancing in his mind.

"Some of the lab scientists like to do their dissections. Something about the muscle and bone densities varying from human, and some weird internal organs. Considering that the Initiative's supposed to be finding out how to fight these things, that's not too weird, you know? And once the parts are too carved up to wrap neatly, they just haul them over to get incinerated. That's not my department. Happens all the damn time." Fenner glared at his computer, and shook his head. "Who the hell is fucking up the records, and why? They finally got the computers to stop crashing all the time, and now this starts up…"

"Damn." Riley shook his head, and then an unwelcome thought crept forward. "Maybe we should check to see if there's anybody else missing?"

"Right." Fenner glared, and started shuffling his cards. A portion of the stack returned to his pocket, and then he started comparing with the computer, leaving Riley time to think ugly and unhappy thoughts. "Can you check twenty? And number four? The computer says they're both empty, but they weren't a couple days ago."

"Right." He opened the drawers, not opening the bags to discover that they also flattened in the way that said 'empty.' The whole thing was going past strange and right into creepy. "Both bodiless, but the bags are here. Should the empty bags even stay in the drawers?"

"Not really. They're supposed to get cleaned out between uses. " Fenner ran his fingers through his hair, and sighed. "Damn, this is a mess."

Riley nodded, closing the drawers again. Something was definitely going on, and he didn't like the feel of it. Missing bodies, people not knowing what was happening, computer records vanishing... "An ugly mess. But I'm going to need to go file some of these... Hopefully I can figure out how to answer a couple of those questions."

He left the morgue room, and stared for a while at some papers on his desk. Missing bodies. Forrest was missing. They'd be getting a new person to integrate into Alpha team, to keep their numbers up, and that wouldn't be the same. None of that told him who would take bodies away, or what they could possibly do with them. The fact that Forrest wasn't the only body to vanish was deeply disturbing.

"Sir? Doctor Walsh is looking for you." The nervous man was dressed in civilian clothing, but carried himself like a soldier. He must have been one of the guys who'd just transferred in, there had been about a dozen of them last month.

"In her office?" He asked, feeling dread tighten inside him, and frowning. There was nothing wrong, he'd just been doing basic paperwork, all of which was even actually his job. But such a poorly expressed idea that something was wrong, and with such shaky evidence in support was not the sort of report that she'd approve of. He'd just have to stay quiet about it until he had something more substantial.

"Yes." The man gave a small salute, and retreated, going towards the practice ranges.

Riley made a deliberate effort to walk normally to Doctor Walsh's office. He had no reason to worry, so there was no reason to act in a way that would make anyone wonder. Tapping at the door, he spoke, "You wanted to see me, Dr. Walsh?"

"Yes, come inside, Riley." She had that faintly unhappy edge that he knew meant she was unpleased with something.

Stepping inside, he closed the door behind him, glancing at the room in hopes of a clue to the cause of her displeasure. Her desk was almost empty, only a few computer disks and a pale folder, like the sort that held personnel records.

He sat down, feeling remarkably tense and stiff. "I was just finishing up the reports for last week."

"I didn't ask you here about reports, Riley." She glanced at the file, and then back at him. "I... I think it would be best if you broke off your relationship with Miss Summers. She's undisciplined, and I'm concerned that she could have a detrimental effect on your performance. She clearly does not understand the order and commitment required from a soldier."

Part of Riley wanted to argue about that. Buffy understood responsibility, she was a Slayer. He did his best to serve his country, but he wasn't out single-handedly defeating prophecies of doom. Another part wondered just why Dr. Walsh was so concerned about his involvement with Buffy. She should only see her as another freshman girl. "Actually, Buffy and I have split up. There was an argument after... Well, I suppose it doesn't matter what it was about."

"I see." Dr. Walsh smiled, looking oddly pleased. "I can understand you wanting to date a little, to enjoy your time away from the HST's and their dangers, but you must remember not to endanger the project or our secrecy. This project is a matter of national security, and that is a matter that we dare not risk."

"Of course not, sir." He murmured, his mind wondering just what threat Dr. Walsh believed Buffy could possibly be to the Initiative. A freshman girl should be of no danger, especially considering that she had no resources to permit any sort of effective information passing. Unless Dr. Walsh knew that Buffy was the... a Slayer. But why should the Initiative fear the Slayer? Weren't they the good guys?

"I'm glad you understand, Riley." Her voice was smooth again, and she stood up, a signal that their little talk was over. "Don't worry too much about the paperwork, I'm sure you'll handle it with your usual competence."

As Riley left her office, he couldn't help but feel like this was yet another puzzle piece to the mysterious things going on. Things were getting more ominous. He just hoped they could figure things out before they got eaten by whatever was going on. This was Sunnydale, that sort of thing happened a lot in this town.

end F&2nd 11: Dark clues.


	12. Poisonous Words

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Buffy, mentions of Faith

Faith and Second Chances 12: Poisonous Words

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

set in season 4.

Riley made his way back towards Lowell House, his mind sorting over his schedule. Thanks to being Dr. Walsh's Teaching Assistant, he had the task of grading this batch of Psychology papers. Sixty seven papers, each supposed to be between five and ten pages, all about behavior adjustment therapies. He could already feel the headache coming on.

"Riley." Buffy's voice, calmer sounding now.

He looked at her, part of him wondering where she'd picked up the bruise that was starting to darken on her cheekbone, if she was standing with her weight on one foot due to injuries on patrol or simply to keep her feet from falling asleep. She looked thinner, as if she hadn't been eating well. With a sigh, he tried to push the concern back - they'd split up, by her choice. She wasn't his responsibility, not that she'd ever let him try to help. "Buffy. I didn't think there was anything left to say."

"You have no idea what kind of person she is, Riley." Buffy took a step closer, her eyes meeting his, as if she could make him listen just by looking into his eyes.

"This is about Faith?" He shook his head, amazed and appalled. Maybe Faith had been right when she'd said that Buffy didn't want to let him move on. "I have bigger problems than your issues with her."

"Riley, you really don't understand." Buffy insisted, one hand grabbing his arm. "She's dangerous."

"Funny that you're calling Faith dangerous when you're the one who gave me a sprained wrist." Riley glared back, remembering her hostility at their breakup. It had been an honest mistake on his part, how was he to know that Faith was in Buffy's body, anyhow? Buffy was probably exaggerating the whole 'Faith was evil' idea anyhow.

"What?" Buffy blinked, looking shocked. "I never... when are you trying to say that I hurt you?"

"Right before you walked out of my room, slammed the door and left whatever relationship we'd had in broken fragments on the floor, like the glass in front of the picture that used to hang on my wall." He tried to pry her fingers away from his arm, to no effect.

Buffy had the grace to glance away, looking embarrassed. "I didn't mean... umm, sorry?"

He just made a non-committal noise, uncertain if he believed her. "Why are you here, Buffy?"

"To warn you. Warn you about the sort of person that she really is." Buffy said, and then looked back up. "She's evil, Riley."

"Buffy, just because you don't like someone, that doesn't mean they're evil." He barely managed to keep from rolling his eyes at her.

"Riley, she betrayed us all last year. She almost killed my boyfriend, almost killed Willow, and very successfully killed several people for the big nasty bad guy. Faith was his personal hit woman, Riley. She's evil." Buffy was almost pleading with him to listen, her voice so intense, her eyes desperate.

"Killed..." Riley blinked, the words much harsher and darker than anything that he'd expected as the cause for Buffy's dislike. "You're telling me that Faith... That she..."

"Faith killed people. Up close and personal, normally with knives. She's dangerous and evil, Riley."

Riley swallowed hard. Faith had said that she'd done some things that she shouldn't, but he hadn't thought it would be that bad. He hadn't thought that she'd done anything really bad.

"I guess she hadn't told you then." Buffy's voice was softer, as if she was offering a bit of sympathy.

"No, she hadn't told me." Riley managed to force the words out.

"I guess she didn't think you'd like her anymore if she did. If you knew the truth about her." Buffy consoled. "But you needed to know."

Riley didn't say anything, but just shook off her hand. "I have things that I have to do, Buffy."

"Where are you going, Riley?" She called after him.

"I told you, I have things that I need to do. Responsibilities. Papers to grade. Commitments." He didn't look back. "Take care of yourself, Buffy."

"Riley? Are you... You don't have to walk away from me like this." Buffy sounded mournful, almost lonely.

"There's nothing but proximity anymore Buffy, remember?" He didn't look back. "You decided that it would be that way."

If only the things that she'd said would be as easy to walk away from. If only he didn't find himself wondering if there was any truth to them. He needed to figure out just how much...well, how much faith he had in Faith. And he'd best hope that it was deserved.

end F&2nd 12: Poisonous Words.


	13. Ugly Questions

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Faith

Faith and Second Chances 13: Ugly Questions

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.

Faith tried to convince herself that everything would be alright as she ran on the treadmill. She had this feeling inside that things were about to change, and it made her nervous. Change was rarely that good, in her experience. Maybe it was just some new demon in the area. Maybe it was related to whatever had resulted in Forrest's body being stolen. Maybe it was just the urge to go out and slay something.

She could hear a door close, and the almost decipherable sound of two guys talking. One was Steve, and she thought the second might be Riley. Riley confused her. He was such a nice guy, and she got this weird fuzzy unsettled feeling when they were close. But it was more than wanting to take him to bed and play, there was something else. She wondered if this was what it was like to care about a guy.

"Faith?" Riley pushed the door to the shed open the rest of the way, looking inside.

"Hey there, soldier." She smiled, wondering what had him looking so tense and uneasy.

"Yeah." Riley shuffled inside, not quite looking at her. "I bumped into Buffy today."

"Which explain the unhappy face." Faith muttered, and then looked at his hands, clenched into fists. "Do I want to know what she had to say?"

"She said that you're dangerous. That you've killed people. Not demons, but human beings." He leaned against the wall, looking hurt and confused. "Was she right?"

"I'm a Slayer, of course I'm dangerous." Faith whispered, and tried to gauge his feelings. Something told her that this would not go well. "I told you that I did some bad things, that I made a mistake and things spiraled out of control. I've never tried to convince you that I'm perfect."

"There's a difference between making some mistakes, doing some things you regret and murder!" Riley stared at her, his eyes pleading for an explanation. For something to make things simple again.

"What, you don't think I should try to do better this time around? You don't think I should try to learn from things?" She had the sinking feeling that Riley's almost boy-scout-ish nice guy side was about to cause problems.

"Something you regret should be..." Riley faltered for words, hands waving as he tried to put his feelings into words. "A tattoo, or a miserable ex that you wish you'd never dated, not a trail of dead bodies and broken promises."

"Some regrets are bigger than others." She whispered, knowing that whatever could-be's that had danced between her and Riley were slowly withering. "But I didn't have any promises that I broke here in Sunnydale."

Riley licked his lips, and slowly asked, "What about bodies?"

Faith knew that there was no easy way to explain things. She wasn't even sure if Riley would understand the haze of confusion and guilt that had filled her at first, or the sense of having no other options that had followed. "Riley, I..."

His pager went off, the shrill noise making them both jump.

"Finn." He answered it, his expression making it clear to Faith that he wasn't going to forget this, wasn't going to give up looking for answers.

Closing her eyes, Faith sighed. Was this delay a good thing, allowing her a chance to find better words? Or was it simply prolonging the inevitable?

"One of the teams on patrol has encountered some trouble. Do you think that you can help?" Riley's eyes were shadowed by his doubts and confusion. "Apparently there's a mixed batch of hostiles, some vampires, and some that thy couldn't identify."

Faith tried to suppress her smile. Vampires and demons were simple things, in comparison. "Yeah, I can help with vamps and demons. Assuming you think I can be dependable back up."

"I think you can do that. I have no doubts about your ability to kill vampires and demons." Riley's words left it clear that he did have other doubts. "Grab a few things, and let's go. I don't want to delay too long, they might not have the time to spare."

Faith nodded, grabbing a pair of stakes and a sword. Noting his raised eyebrow, she shrugged. "Some things need dismembered to stop them from attacking and make them die. Besides, it'll work against vamps if I loose both stakes."

"errr... yeah." Riley shook his head and moved towards the door. "We'll take the jeep."

Following him, Faith found herself actually hoping for some enormous impending disaster. If they had to focus on preventing some sort of apocalypse or huge crisis, Riley couldn't demand all the sordid details of her past mistakes, couldn't reject her like everyone else had. She could feel like someone actually still gave a damn for a little while longer.

It was a long, tense twenty minutes as Riley's jeep roared into Sunnydale's old industrial section. She could see several other guys, all in the camouflage uniforms of the Initiative, and they were looking at her funny, as if they had no clue why she would be there.

"Someone tell me what the situation is." Riley demanded, looking at the soldiers. "Where's Daniels?"

"He... He's inside. He said that he'd do a quick recon and report. He radioed that there were at least six vampires, and four other hostiles that he couldn't identify. One was supposed to be about eight feet tall with red scales, and then..." The soldier swallowed before continuing, "He said to call for reinforcements. There was a bit of quiet and then a lot of static."

"Good chance that he's in trouble, or past troubles." Faith murmured, more to herself than to any of the soldiers. The pale faces and tension that she could see was enough to let her know that she wasn't the only one who'd had that unhappy thought.

"I guess we'll go in. Try not to get separated, and be sure to cover each other." Riley spoke, his tone firm, demanding obedience.

An assortment of nods and 'yessir's followed his order, and the soldiers gripped their weapons. One of them pulled something from his shirt, muttering something that must have been a prayer as they turned to face the door. Faith gripped the sword in her right hand and a stake in the left, and prepared to kick some vampire and demon ass. This would be the simple part - kill the monsters, and try not to let anyone else get killed in the process.

Faith almost lost herself in the fighting. Staking vampires, slashing demons... It was easy, wonderful. She'd always loved the rush of a good fight. Then she caught a glimpse of the thing in charge, and felt herself go cold.

It was some sort of patchwork monstrosity. It looked as if someone had taken an assortment of bits and pieces of different demons and put them together like a demented jigsaw puzzle. Bits of him even looked almost human.

"Stop the humans! Prove that you are stronger." The voice was deep, and sounded unexpectedly human.

One of the soldiers stared at the thing, his lips moving, forming a single word, a name. "Jack?"

Faith threw her stake, hoping to distract or kill the vampire that was trying to grab the stunned soldier, resolving later to try to ask him who Jack was, and why he was thinking of him when they were under attack.

During the chaos of the fighting, the patchwork leader escaped. Five demons ended up dead or dying on the floor of the warehouse, and there were heaps and scattering of vampire ashes all over. One of the soldiers found the mangled remains of Daniels. It looked as if he'd been opened up, as if by someone or something curious about how a human's insides worked.

"What was that thing?" Riley asked, his voice betraying a hint of panic.

"I've never seen anything like it." Faith wiped the blade of her sword against one of the demons, hoping to get the worst of the mess away. "It looked like someone wasn't happy with all the regular demons and decided to build their own."

"It looked like Jack." The soldier's voice was louder, almost at normal volume, though he sounded like he was bordering on shock. "Jack's dead, and now there's some sort of thing with part of his face."

Faith's head snapped up, looking at the man. Had he just said... He had. It looked like Riley had heard those words as well. If this thing looked like a dead soldier... What about Forrest? What about any other soldiers of the Initiative who had perished in the line of duty? Would they be resurfacing as patchwork creations? Who in the Initiative would be twisted enough to do that to their own people?

"There's nothing more that we can do here, guys." Riley spoke slowly, as if his mind was too full of horrible speculation. "I think we should all call it a night, some things are just... Someone call in about Daniels, and I think we should all go back to somewhere secure and try to remember how to breathe."

The silence on the way back to jeep had a completely different feel. No longer was Riley's mind in tormented confusion about Faith, but about the thing that they had seen. About the ugly possibilities that it hinted at.

"It would take a medical doctor to put something together like that, wouldn't it?" Riley sounded as if he was thinking out loud, or perhaps hoping that she would find some reason why his horrible suspicions couldn't be true.

"I think so. Either that or one hell of a magician."

"It would also have to be someone... One of ours. Someone in a position to get all the bodies, to take pieces without anyone asking questions." His voice shook.

Faith nodded, trying to resist the urge to point out the obvious - one of the Initiative's scientists had betrayed them. "Someone who either doesn't care if they get found out or someone that really should have used better security."

He glared at her, and then sighed. "Yeah. I just... It's not right. Bad enough that we're fighting things that we don't understand, bad enough that we face the risks of death or injury each time we go out..."

"You feel betrayed, and you don't have words to cover how bad it feels." Faith nodded, knowing what he meant.

"Exactly." Riley reached towards the door of the jeep, keys already in his hand. "WHen I find out who did this to us... They're going to have to court marshal me for what I do to him. Or her."

Somehow, Faith felt worse now that she'd gotten her unspoken wish for something to delay their talk about what she had done.

end F&2nd 13: Ugly Questions.


	14. Crushing Truths

Author: Lucinda

Similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Graham

Faith and Second Chances 14: Crushing Truths

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.

The next day, Riley went down to the Initiative base to find Dr. Walsh. Regardless of the chaos that was going on, he was still the TA for her psychology class at the university. There were tests to be returned and some essays for the abnormal behavior class, all of which she'd had in her office.

He wasn't expecting the bustling confusion. There were scientists looking confused, and scowling soldiers. Looking around, he finally spotted Graham, who would at least be someone that he knew could give a coherent response. "Graham, what's going on here?"

"Walsh is dead." Graham replied, and then looked at the hall, leading to some of the smaller laboratories. "She was found in one of the rooms, and it looked like something had stabbed her."

"Stabbed?" Riley repeated, a dark and unhappy feeling rising inside. "Stabbed with what?"

"Maybe impaled would be a better word." Graham mused, before looking back to Riley. "Dr. Caldwell said the wounds were almost identical to the one that killed Forrest. She said that it was probably the same creature responsible for both deaths."

"But the Polgara was dead. Not only that, but Dr. Walsh was in here, not out in the field." Riley felt confused by the whole thing. The pieces were trying to fit together, but he really didn't like the picture that they were starting to make.

"I know. Apparently, she was working on some sort of project in one of the labs. Whatever it was, apparently the entity responsible for her death took or destroyed the project." Graham's voice was very calm, very flat. "That's the verdict from Captain Keller."

Riley nodded, and made his way towards her office. "I need to pick up those papers for the psych classes."

Graham followed, his silence somehow conveying a feeling of not-aloneness. "You'll have to take those by yourself for now."

Inside the office, he looked over the desk, focusing on remembering where things were put. "The papers..."

There was a stack of computer disks in the drawer next to the psych papers. Sighing, he picked them up. "At least I've got the lesson plans."

As he made his way back towards the elevator, Riley couldn't help but wonder if it was really so simple. The patchwork monster... His mind kept going back to it. Making a decision, he turned towards the records room instead.

There was a soldier on duty, scanning reports into the computer. "Can I help you, sir?"

"Yes, I wanted to see a picture of the Polgara, if you can." Riley fought to keep his voice level, to sound casual. "There was something last night, I wanted to try to make an identification."

The clerk nodded, and called up a new window on his computer. "It might take me a few moments to find it, sir."

Riley nodded, and tried to wait quietly as the clerk searched for a picture. "There was a briefing prepared on a Polgara, sir. I'll load it up, there should be several pictures in it."

As the images flashed on the screen, Riley felt himself go cold inside. The Polgara had killed Forrest. And he would never forget it's ugly appearance. That arm, with the bone spike that had shot out...

The arm was exactly the same as the right arm on the patchwork demon.

"There was a note to try to bring this one in as intact as possible, so the scientists could study its physiology." The clerk's words only added to that bad feeling. "Does this help, sir?"

"Some." He was dimly surprised that his voice was steady. "The creature that we spotted last night wasn't a Polgara, but now that I can see the picture, there were some definite similarities."

"Glad to be of assistance, sir." The clerk replied, returning his attention to the stack of reports. "Was there anything else?"

"No, that's all for now." Riley murmured, already moving. The patchwork monster had the Polgara's arm. The arm from something that he knew had been killed, and the body taken into the Initiative for study. Doctor Walsh had been working on a project when she was killed...

What if her killer hadn't destroyed the project? What if he or she had taken it?

It wasn't until he was sorting though the papers to see what had been graded and what hadn't that a darker suspicion arose. What if the killer had been the project?

"No, it couldn't be. She couldn't have." The words were a soft plea, though he wasn't certain quite whom he addressed them towards.

In a state of denial, he started to grade the remaining tests. She couldn't have done that to her own soldiers. She'd once said that they were like the children that she'd never had. It had to have been someone else.

He picked up the first disk, noticing that they were only labeled with numbers, not any words. Would it have been too much trouble to label them by the classes that she was teaching?

As he slid it into the computer, he had a moment of guilty thought, wondering if maybe the disks were something else, unrelated to her psychology classes. No, they had to connect to the classes, or else why would they have been in that drawer? It had only held college stuff, her class schedule, the syllabi for the classes, class rosters, and the papers to be graded. They had to connect.

There certainly did seem to be a lot of them for a couple classes though. Maybe it was just that PowerPoint presentations took a lot of memory space, and she liked to use those to explain things. Yes that had to be it.

The disk contained several long files, and one short one, none of which had names that made him think of psychology. Actually, they looked more like some sort of lab reports.

The short one was labeled 'Project 300.'

He didn't breathe as he opened the file. A part of his mind whispered that this was wrong, this was an invasion of her privacy. It wasn't connected to her classes; he had no business to look into this. But he looked at the screen anyhow.

It was some sort of study about physical enhancement drugs. His first thought was steroids, but what would a psychologist be doing with a report about steroids? Looking more carefully, he realized that it wasn't steroids but hormone supplements and adjustments. That made a little more sense, adjusting the levels of hormones could cause changes in behavior.

All the subjects appeared to be males between the ages of eighteen and twenty six. That didn't seem quite right; didn't a good study require a broader range? Older or younger volunteers, or maybe a check for the effects on females? There were female athletes as well as men. Performance enhancing hormones were possibly safer than steroids, but he was pretty sure that there were steroid problems among women athletes as well.

He looked further down the report, frowning as he came to a single, glaring phrase - 'the subjects are still unaware of the effects, and side effects have remained within acceptable parameters.' What were these 'acceptable parameters', and what sort of side effects did the report mean? Who had been doing this study anyhow?

The more he read, the worse he felt. He didn't recognize the designations for some of the hormones, but maybe that was just because his studies had been in psychology, not biology? Regardless, it was becoming clear that this wasn't some sort of double blind study, but something where the subjects didn't even know that they were the subjects of an experiment.

Those poor guys. Experimented on without their knowledge or consent. Given who knew what all sorts of hormones that would do who knew what to their bodies... Changing anything in the body had further effects.

The study was listed as ongoing. Ongoing where? What research facility would be willing to risk everything on something so... Unprofessional? Illegal?

The very end listed names of the people responsible for this study. Dr. H. L. O'Brien. Dr. D. I. Hubbard. Dr. M. R. Walsh.

Dr. Walsh was one of the people responsible for this study?

How could she do something like that?

He almost dropped the disk as he took it out and put in another one, from closer to the bottom of the stack. It had more massive files, and he could only conclude that those were the detailed reports about the project, not the report that summarized them. This one was labeled 'Project 312.'

Everything went cold as he read this file. It should have been perfectly fine, just a bit of medical documentation. Apparently, organs had been successfully transplanted, with the new drugs preventing tissue rejection. But something about it didn't sound quite right. Organ transplants were done in hospital surgical suits, not private labs, weren't they? They tried to get as close of a genetic match as possible, they didn't depend on hormone supplements and immuno-suppresants to prevent a rejection.

The pieces fit themselves together. Project 312 was organ transplants, and he was starting to think that the organ donors weren't human. Dr. Walsh had been doing hormone studies on people who didn't know they had become the subjects of an experiment. Either she had been involved, or she had known what was happening and permitted it to continue.

Now, someone had to do was figure out how to clean up after this mess. Someone had to find a way to prevent the patchwork monster from killing again. Someone had to figure out if the same thing had been done to any of the other fallen soldiers.

"How's it feel to be someone?" Riley whispered to himself.

End F&2ndC 14: Crushing Truths.


	15. Bandages and Battle Plans

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Faith

Faith and Second Chances 15: Bandages and Battle Plans

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.

Faith frowned as Riley entered Steve's place. There was this horrible blankness on his face, the look of someone who has just seen something unimaginably horrible and been confronted with the fact that they can't pretend it didn't happen, it won't go away. The look that said monsters were real and they'd just eaten your best friend.

"Riley?" She moved towards him, worried.

He didn't say anything, just clutching a bag in his hand. The other hand was clenched into a fist, and there was a faint trickle of blood coming from inside, welling up between clenched fingers, slow fat drops falling to the floor.

"Riley?" Faith walked towards him, a feeling of cold dread in her stomach as she wondered what was in his hand, what was in the bag. "Riley, talk to me."

He walked into the counter as if he didn't even see it, and his hand flailed to the side. It looked as if he was trying to apply his fist to the face of an attacker, but there was nobody there.

She caught his wrist, noticing that his tendons and muscles were wire taut. "Riley, snap out of it!"

His other hand punched towards her, but she was able to block the blow, following that up with a solid push backwards. His back connected with the wall, the force of impact enough that things perched on the edges of shelves fell to the floor with a loud clatter.

Riley blinked, his eyes slowly focusing on his surroundings. "Faith? I'm... How did I get here?"

"Through the front door, walking like a bad horror movie robot." Faith leaned back, and folded her arms across her chest. "The counter's not going to attack you."

Riley's fist unclenched, and he pushed against the wall with his hand as he stood up, leaving a bloody handprint behind him. "I found... She was... I don't understand how she could do it. I'm not sure how she managed it either. It was horrible."

"I think you're a few pages ahead of me," Faith confessed, moving closer. "Let me take a look at your hand while you start at the beginning? Who did what?"

He held out the small bag, his hand shaking. "It's on these disks. She... We trusted her. We listened, never questioned any of it... Damn."

Faith took the bag and then grabbed his other wrist, looking at his palm. Four gouges marred the underside of his hand, obviously caused by his blunt nails being drug across the palm. The force that it would take... Not impossible, but ordinarily, he'd damn well be aware of what had happened to his hand. She glanced at his face, seeing the pained shock. "It was someone in the Initiative who made that monster?"

"She did. It was her brilliant horrible plan. But he wasn't the first, wasn't supposed to be one of a kind. She started long before him." Riley's hand was starting to curl into a fist again.

"I thought she was just a psychology person?" Faith asked, certain there was stuff that she was missing, and a lot of it.

"Medical first, then psychology." He whispered, and then closed his eyes. "She's been running experiments. Illegal to do drug research on people who don't know. They don't know, and I don't know who they are. She's giving them all sorts of stuff from God only knows where..."

"Riley? Who's she giving drugs to?" Faith was getting a bad feeling about this research.

"I don't know. A bunch of guys, all over eighteen and under thirty. Side effects are under acceptable fucking parameters, whatever that meant to her." His voice was full of pain and betrayal.

Faith blinked, and considered the ages. "Eighteen to thirty... Strong, healthy guys? A collection of easily monitored guys in good shape?"

"That's what the report said. It didn't say where, or how she was explaining the test away, since they don't know." He sighed, and opened his eyes, blinking at his hand. "ow."

"What about a batch of guys right under her thumb? People who aren't going to be talking too much to outsiders because it would blow their cover?" Faith asked the questions, hoping that his mind would be focused enough to follow her logic.

"Where would she get a bunch of people worried about..." Riley swallowed, hard. "You mean us. The soldiers of the Initiative."

"The pieces fit, don't they? You know there's weirdness. She can send you out for the demons, and study their pieces later." Faith tried to keep her voice even, to not yell or curse or hit things. "If someone dies, the rest of you aren't expecting to really know what happens, as long as someone say's they've taken care of it. That whole following orders thing can discourage original thought and questions."

"I wish I could argue with you." Riley's voice was bleak. "But that would explain why that thing looked like Jack. It would explain a lot of things if she was using us for her experiments."

Faith pulled Riley to his feet, softly explaining, "We need to get your hand taken care of. Clean it up, some bandages..."

"You can't make it all better." Riley followed her, shoulders slumping. "My hand, yes, but not... Not the rest."

"Riley, if I could change the past, fix things that got messed up a while ago, don't you think I would have before this? You have no idea how many things I wish I could go back and change." She sighed, and then asked, "So, what's going to happen to her now?"

"She's dead. That patchwork abomination killed her last night." Riley closed his eyes, shaking his head. "She's dead and won't have to suffer as her monster goes out and kills more people. We need to figure out how to stop it. Him. She called it Adam."

"Damn." Faith couldn't find any better words for the whole situation.

"Yeah." Riley admitted. "Damn."

Faith pulled him to the kitchen, grabbing the first aid kit from under the sink. "You said there was info on this demonic frankenstein on those disks? Are we going to be able to find a weakness for it?"

"Frankenstein was the doctor, not the monster." Riley commented, his eyes unfocused. "I... If there's a weakness, it might be there. But I don't know if I'll know how to recognize it. We might need to call a few more people into this. Medical students maybe."

"Do you think any of your Initiative guys could help with that? The only person that I could think of is Willow, and I don't know how much help we'd get from one of Buffy's pals." Faith wanted Riley to come back, to think and focus on here and now.

"I don't know. Forrest would have been the person to ask, but..." Riley trailed into silence. "Maybe we should see if Steve can help, he knows a little about a lot of things besides electronics."

"Then let's start looking." Faith decided, hoping that they'd find something.

end F&2nd 15: Bandages and Battle Plans


	16. Brothers?

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Faith, also featuring Graham and Steve

Faith and Second Chances 16: Brothers

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. I do own Steve.

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed.

Faith decided to start by dragging Steve out of the basement. Not literally, but when he had free time, he could often be found, watching one of his sci-fi movies. He might be able to help decipher the disks, and failing that, he could probably help keep Riley from going into betrayed shock.

Not that she could blame him for feeling that way. He had every right to feel shocked, appalled, and betrayed. They'd already known that someone had built a monster out of pieces taken from demons and at least one human. The fact that it had been someone that he'd trusted though...

By now, the sound of the Babylon 5 title music was easily identifiable. "Hey Steve, change of plans. Turn off the sci-fi, you've got a project to help us with."

"Help who? It's going to be the first appearance of the Shadows, and..." He paused, looking at her face. Clicking off the movie, he muttered, "This is serious, isn't it?"

"Someone made a patchwork monster out of spare parts." Faith decided to try to keep her description as low on the emotional pain ratio as possible, and tried to stick with the disgusting factor. "Riley found some info, and we're hoping that your scientific genius can help us figure out how to get rid of that bad boy monster before he turns some people into spare parts."

"That's..." For a moment, Steve was silent, and he scrambled up from his couch. "How could they keep the parts working? What about tissue compatibility? Organ rejection?"

"That's the science part. I only got halfway through high school biology, so I don't have the first idea, since it looks like they used science and not big evil magic. That's what you're for."

"You only drag me out of the basement to pick my brains..." He shook his head. "But it does sound big. More important than watching B5 on DVD."

"Well, it's certainly not your cooking." Faith put her hand on his back, pushing him along toward the room where Riley was supposed to be waiting with the disks. "You need to help me keep Riley from freaking out and going silent again."

Riley had placed the disk on the desk beside the computer, and he was pacing back and forth over the floor. His fingers kept rubbing over the bandages over his palm. Overall, he looked terrible, but not too bad for someone who'd just learned that someone he'd trusted completely had screwed him and a bunch of other people over.

"Those are the disks, science-boy." Faith pointed, and gave Steve a gentle push towards the computer. Well, gentle for her, he only staggered a few steps. "Riley, why don't you call Graham, see if he can help figure out something."

Riley nodded, and pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, and then just stared at it for a few moments, as if he had completely forgotten how to use it. He sank to the chair, and pushed a few buttons, getting the impatient listening expression of someone listening to the phone ring, wondering if the person on the other end would pick up.

"Graham? Yeah, today has been something. I was wondering, could you come over and... umm... pizza and movies or something. Science Fiction."

"Everybody's been a bit out of it today. I thought you could use a change of scenery."

"No, I'm not secretly trying to set you up on a date." Riley had a small smile at that.

Faith sighed and leaned against the doorway, wishing that she could actually hear what Graham was saying on the other end. She could hear noise, but not clear enough to understand him.

Snapping the cell phone closed, Riley looked up. "He'll be here soon. I just... This whole thing..."

"The whole thing never should have happened." Faith finished for him.

"Yeah." He looked so sad, flushed and drooping in the chair. So much for military posture from the good soldier.

"I'll just start printing these out, and then we can all look at stuff, okay?" Steve spoke nervously, his fingers moving to make it so even as he asked. "This is just... Well, it's technically amazing, but..."

"Horrible." The word came from Riley, a single hollow word.

Faith could only spend so much time reading over the files before she wanted to kill someone. Walsh, even though she'd never met the woman, would have been her first choice, but almost anything would do. The urge to do violence frightened her a little, made her wonder if she was slipping back to the cold killer that she'd become before her coma. She shivered, knowing that if that happened, she would probably hurt a lot more people this time.

"Guys? Let's put these down for a while and go on a patrol. I need to find something that I can hurt." From the way they'd been muttering, fists connecting to the table, she hoped they'd understand.

"Yeah, that sounds good." Riley's voice was still flatter than normal, as if he was trying not to let himself feel.

It felt like no time at all before she was out with Riley and Graham, armed to the teeth and looking for some unlucky demon or vamp. All three of them were tense, alert for the slightest sign that they weren't alone.

Even with that, they weren't expecting what happened.

A pair of vampires stepped out from behind the mausoleum, their fanged grins a clear sign that they did not come in peace. Really, between their weapons, the fact that both guys knew how to fight and Faith being a Slayer, the pair of vamps didn't have a chance.

There was the sound of someone clapping as the vampires fell to dust on the ground.

Adam stood there, his patchwork face terrible in the moonlight. In a half circle behind him were almost a dozen vampires and demons, watching them. "Very good. I see that you are not so weak, my brothers."

"Brother?" Riley repeated the word, his back going stiff and straight as he glared back.

"Mother hadn't done as much work on you yet, but she intended to. I was the first, and I was not intended to be the only one." Adam paused, and his head tilted to the side. "Didn't she tell you?"

"Personally, I don't see the resemblance." Faith quipped, looking at the waiting minions.

"It's all inside for him." Adam smiled, the expression lopsided and chilling on his face. "The same chemicals flow inside him as me."

Riley made a noise, not quite words. It was an effort of denial, hopelessly futile.

"Are we going to kill them now?" A vampire asked, lurking to the right.

The bone spear shot out of the demon arm, impaling the vampire. As the minion fell to dust, his shocked expression lingering, Adam shook his head. "They are not ready, and I need to make more preparations. Until then, have a pleasant evening, brothers."

Faith stood there, one hand gripping Riley and the other supporting Graham as Adam and his entourage left. The guys were too stunned, too horrified by the implications of what the monster had said to be steady on their feet, and Faith found herself oddly glad that Adam wasn't ready yet.

"The arms don't match." Graham's voice was low and uncertain. "On the last demon in line, they don't quite match."

"He's following her plans." Riley's voice was harsh, thick with the emotions that he'd been suppressing. "He's altering them, putting on different parts."

"You know, it's so much easier when the monsters are dumb." Faith sighed, trying to pretend that she wasn't terrified and appalled and angry. "Then they just want you to die, maybe be dinner. This... This is worse."

"How do we fight him? How could we fight him and all his followers, when he can just... make more?" Graham whispered, still staring into the darkness where Adam had gone.

Faith shivered, and started to pull them back towards the jeep. "I don't know."

The question played in all their minds as Riley drove them back to Steve's house.

end Faith & Second Chances 16: Brothers?


	17. Rockets, Plans and Spikes

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Faith, also appearances of Spike, Graham and Steve.

Faith and Second Chances 17: Rockets, Plans and Spikes

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Steve is mine.

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

notes: set in season 4, AU after the body-switching has been reversed. Contains the death of a BtVS recurring character.

After that encounter with the patchwork that Walsh's notes referred to as 'Adam,' nobody had wanted to go out alone in the darkness. Graham had crashed on the couch, and they'd all spent a restless night trying to sleep. Morning had brought no peace, and over coffee, they'd started trying to make a plan.

Faith, Riley and Graham had tried to toss out ideas about how to get rid of a patchwork monster like that. Steve had found the blueprints for him, and was searching for any weakness that they could exploit.

"It's as if he was designed to eliminate the weaknesses of the component parts." Steve's voice had taken on a distant quality, a sure sign that he wasn't letting himself think about the fact that this wasn't some theoretical problem but a monster right here.

Riley had looked over, his expression bleak. "He probably was. Anything useful in there?"

"He's not powered by biochemical activity, but by a small reactor in his chest." Steve replied, and then frowned. "That's pretty risky, studies on long term exposure to even low levels of radiation... It's not good. Causes sterility in men."

"At least we know he can't breed more, only build them." Faith grumbled, shaking her head at the unwelcome images Steve's comment had spawned.

"That's... ick." Graham shook his head, before adding, "Vampires. His minions were partly vampires, which don't really reproduce, but they don't just die either. How likely is he to try to give them a few upgrades?"

"I'd think he wouldn't be able to do too much, considering. They're probably the expendable front line." Faith offered, hoping that she was right.

"Damn, there's those psych classes." Riley exclaimed, sitting up. "I'm going to have to go over to the college for a while."

"It's okay guys. I'm not going to fall apart." Faith tried to smile, certain that she'd failed. "You and Graham crackers have to go do your college things so that the whole world doesn't find out that you're soldier boys. Go, Steve and I will be fine."

Reluctantly, the soldiers left. Despite their concerns over Adam, they did have other responsibilities.

Looking at the pair of them, Faith called, "Hey Riley? You and me, tonight. Wide patrol, we'll kick some demons and vamps around a little, try to figure out where Adam's holed up."

Riley nodded, turning a little pink. "It's a date. I mean... yeah, patrol tonight. Good idea."

Faith watched them drive away, and turned back towards the garage. There was a punching bag, which might help a little, if she didn't forget her strength and break it. This whole mess, right on top of waking up to a world that had moved on without her was worse than a nightmare. They had to find a solution. Something, anything...

She tried to empty her mind, to push away everything. Bits kept floating in, random song lyrics, the punch-line to an old joke, an old hamburger commercial. As she kept hitting the bag, the fragments changed, becoming bits of advice on demons that penny had given her, fragments of fights, bits of stories that B had told her when she'd first gotten to Sunnydale, before everything fell apart.

Wait... Hadn't there been some giant smurf-thing that was supposedly indestructible? Right, something called the Judge, from when Angel was all sexy and evil. How had they stopped it? Maybe that would be good against Adam.

Xander had come up with the solution. They'd destroyed an ancient demon that was... how did that go? Right, could not be harmed by any weapon forged by man. They'd shot him with a rocket launcher and blown him to bits. If it had worked against something almost invincible, it should work against Adam, if they could get a rocket launcher. Maybe Riley would have an idea or two. She'd have to bring it up later.

"Steve?" Faith called, stepping back inside the house.

"There is no magic self destruct button." His voice was slightly muffled. "And no, we can't use a radio transmitter to over-ride his brain and control him by remote."

"Both of those are good to know." Faith smirked, walking into the computer room. "But you've been watching too many scifi movies. I wanted to know if it would work to just blast him with a rocket launcher."

"Assuming that we could get one, you mean." Steve made a 'hmmm' noise, and looked back at the computer for a few moments. "I think it should work."

"I'm hoping that Riley can get one, either from the Initiative supplies or some other way. If we can blast that Adam to bits, I don't care where the rocket launcher comes from."

Feeling slightly better now that there was a sketchy plan, Faith tried to keep from worrying too much. She tossed some things into a crock-pot so there would be dinner, and practiced some of her sword work, which she'd been neglecting. She cleaned out the garage, and had to take a shower. The garage didn't really make her feel better about Adam, or about her own failings in the past, her own sins. But it did take a lot of time.

Riley came back from college, and they started out on a patrol. The quiet between them felt awkward, and Faith found herself wondering what was bothering Riley, and if she'd rather he talk about it or let it bubble uncomfortably between them. Was it Adam? Her own ugly past? Forrest?

"How much of what she said is true?" The words finally came out as they were walking through a cemetery. "Buffy said… she said a lot of things. What was real?"

"I don't know what all she said. For me, things were never really what you'd call good. I had Penny, and she was trying her best to prepare me for a destiny that promised pain, suffering, and an early grave. She got… Penny died, and I ran away from the guy who did it before I could be next. I'd failed her, she'd died because I wasn't fast enough, wasn't strong enough... I came here, hoping… I don't know, I guess I didn't really think I'd make it. But I did, and there were Watchers, and another Slayer, and I thought… Maybe this time it would be better. But it wasn't. B had her mom who's a great lady, and she had friends, and Giles really did his best for her, and there… There was nothing for me except the bruises and pain, again. Then B and I were on a patrol together…" Faith's words faltered as she felt the vampires. "Lots of vamps, Riley. They're trying to surround us.

The fight took a while, but the great thing about being surrounded by idiotic vampire minions, if there could be said to be any advantage to that situation at all, was that most of them were too stupid to really work together. They kept getting in each others way, and had no practice at teamwork. It was a long fight, and left her with a number of bruises and some minor scrapes, with Riley only a little worse off, but they managed to kill them all.

"Was that a warning, or part of the story?" Riley gasped, still trying to catch his breath after the chaotic attack.

"Both, but set it in an alley and substitute B in for you. Then end it with this guy in the wrong place at the worst time…" Faith looked away, making certain that her stake was still pointy as she tucked it back out of sight. "B grabbed him, and she must have thought he was a vamp or something, because she tossed him my way, and I staked him."

"He wasn't a vampire." Riley's tone made it clear that he wasn't making a guess. "Wait, Buffy was with you?"

"He wasn't a vamp, and she was right there. Things… Hell, things fell apart, and I freaked. Everybody was freaking out, and I still don't know what he was doing in a dark alley in Sunnydale at a quarter past eleven." Faith paused, trying to figure out how to explain what had happened, what she'd been thinking or not-thinking. "My whole life, I'd been told that I'd have to go out and kill the monsters, and Penny promised that she'd always be there to make sure everything else was taken care of. Penny was gone, the only people who might have a clue why I'd be running around with a sharp piece of wood were talking about sending me to the Council to be taken care of, and I panicked. One dies and another is Chosen, you know, what if these Council people just decided that it would be easier to start over with someone else? No more Faith, no more mess, and they still get two Slayers."

"Damn…" Riley looked like he had no idea what to say. "Faith, I…"

"I'm not saying that it was all good. And I certainly didn't exactly handle things very well. I was scared, and I didn't think, but that guy… he was an accident." Faith looked away, unsure what she'd see in Riley's face.

"She said you worked for the evil mayor Snake-guy." Riley's voice was soft, as if he wasn't sure he wanted to know.

"He was there, and he seemed so nice, so… helpful. Like one of those nice dad on the really old television shows, you know?" Faith tried to explain Dick, knowing that words would fall short. "He said I was just a girl who'd lost her way, that I needed someone to take care of me and help me figure out what to do. He said that if I'd let him, he'd take good care of me."

"Did he take care of you?" Riley asked.

"Yeah, he got me out of the dive where I was staying and set me up in this great apartment. Clean clothing to wear, nice toys, a doctor if I got hurt out there… Of course, he wanted something for it all." Faith could feel a tear prickling at her eye. "It stared out simple, just getting rid of some demons and vamps that were causing him some problems. Pretty much the same thing that I'd already been doing as a Slayer, you know? And he got rid of the Council swat-squad, the ones that were going to drag me away and take care of me."

"Then he started to ask for a little more, things that were a bit different than Slayer stuff?" Riley sounded like he was starting to at least follow the events, even if he didn't like them. Even if he'd probably end up hating her almost as bad as B did by the time she was done.

"Yeah. By the time he was asking me to kill humans for him, I couldn't see any other choice. He was there for me, taking care of me when nobody else would. Not the Council, not the guy they finally sent to be my Watcher, not B, not my relatives, just him. And it's not that much of a jump from killing demons and vamps to killing humans… Except that it makes a lot more of a difference with the way people look at you."

"It makes a lot of sense." Riley sounded like he was trying to think of it like a problem in a book. "He found you when you were vulnerable, and took advantage of it. He did something to benefit you, and started asking for a little, gradually asking for more until… there you were. No way out and nobody left to turn to for help."

"Yeah." Faith frowned as she realized they were walking down a street, unsure when they'd left the cemetery. "On a completely different note, can you get a rocket launcher?"

"Can I get a… why?" Riley blinked, clearly unsure how a rocket launcher connected with anything.

"To get rid of Adam. If we can't fight him hand to hand and bullets and tazers don't work, maybe a rocket launcher will." Faith explained, hoping that he'd see and understand.

"That's a good idea." Riley looked thoughtful, "I think so. It might not be easy, but I think I can manage it. Maybe two, then Graham and I can get him in crossfire or at least have a second shot."

Faith nodded, and then frowned as she felt the presence of a vampire. They weren't too close and there was only one, but it was an older vamp. She started to look around.

"Hey, isn't that one of Xander's friends?" Riley asked, his tone sounding convinced that something wasn't right, even if he wasn't sure what was wrong.

Frowning at Riley's words, Faith moved closer. Just the one guy, and he was definitely a vamp. Come to think of it, that looked like the place where Giles lived. This didn't seem to be adding up right to her, so instead of staking him, she tackled the vampire.

Odd how he didn't put up a very effective fight. He almost got away by squirming out of the leather coat, but Riley punched him, the blow causing the fangs to show as the vampire staggered a little.

They dragged the vampire and his coat back into the cemetery. Faith slammed him up against a mausoleum, still not grabbing the stake. "So, Riley, how do you recognize this guy?"

"I saw him when I met up with Buffy for a problem, he… he said he was a friend of Xander's." Riley started searching though the pockets, occasionally grimacing at what he found. "Somehow, I don't believe him anymore. He still looks sort of familiar."

"I thought I wouldn't have to deal with any of you bloody soldiers again." The vampire's words held a definite British feel, though nothing like the way Giles talked.

"Hostile seventeen!" Riley hit the vampire, scowling at him.

"Bloody Hell1" the vampire clutched at his nose, yellow eyes glaring at them.

"Why don't you tell us what you were doing over there." Faith suggested, one thumb indicating the houses. "Tell us why you tried to claim that you're a pal of Xander's."

"Why should I tell you anything?" The vampire growled.

Faith slowly made a fist, but Riley hit the vampire first. Shrugging, she looked him in the eyes and said, "You can tell us now, or we can hit you a bit first, maybe hang around till about six, six thirty in the morning. It's up to you."

"I'm part of the gang now." The vampire smirked at them. "Part of their group, and the Slayer is depending on me to learn more about their problems. Seems there's this big nasty out there, calls himself Adam."

Faith hit him this time, her fist slamming into his guts with enough force that things would have ruptured in a human. "How do you know about Adam?"

"You're going to break someone doing things like that." He tried to look reproachful, only achieving a look of pain.

"Adam did have vampire minions." Riley commented, looking at the vampire. "Or maybe… What were you doing at Giles' house?"

"I gave them some information. Useful information, if they can find someone capable of cracking that code." He smirked again, and tried to pull away. "If you'll just let go, the Slayer's expecting me back."

Faith narrowed her eyes, wondering how the vampire would have gotten encoded disks. The disks that Riley had found weren't encoded, so where would he have found them? "You got them from that patchwork bastard."

The look of panic in the vampires eyes could only mean that her guess was right.

"Maybe Adam offered to do something about the inhibitor chip," Riley mused, glaring at the vampire. "You sold them out to someone who probably can't be trusted. They were protecting you and you sold them out."

Faith pulled her stake, not taking her eyes off the vampire. "I know how to keep him from telling the bad guys anything else."

"I can be quiet!" The vampire tried to squirm out of her grasp.

Faith plunged the stake into his chest, watching as he slowly crumbled, the bones about three fast heartbeats slower than the rest of him. "I believe you can, fang-boy."

"Do you think that will help?" Riley asked, looking at the stake that was still embedded in the tree.

"Maybe not against Adam, but I feel better." Faith shrugged, and turned to look at Riley. "So, you'll try to get a rocket launcher, and we hope that we can get rid of Adam before he expands his family?"

"And we know he can't make anything worse now." Riley nodded, starting to walk back towards the jeep. "I still don't like what you did."

"I take it you mean last year, with the Mayor, not staking blondie back there?" Faith commented, wiping the traces of dust from her hands.

"Right. He was just another demon, and a traitor. Sunnydale's probably safer without him." Riley's words were calm. "I understand how the mess with the Mayor could have happened, but I still don't like it."

"Riley, I don't like what happened, and it was my life." Faith stuffed her hands into her pockets and sighed. "It happened, I can't change it, all I can do is move on."

"It won't be easy." Riley cautioned.

"Since when is anything easy? I can work through this… I hope." Faith retorted.

End Rockets, Plans and Spikes.


	18. Shooting in the Darkness

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Faith, Graham

Faith and Second Chances 18: Shooting in the Darkness

disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

Notes: set in season 4, just after the body-switching has been reversed. :words in colons: are over a telephone or radio and come from the person who is not present at the scene.

Riley tucked the blanket around the boxes, hoping that nobody looked in the back of his jeep. Even in Sunnydale, it wasn't normal to carry a pair of rocket launchers and a box of ammunition for them around in your car. But Faith's plan had made a lot of sense. Adam was designed to be tough, and rocket launchers were designed to be able to take out tanks, it just might work.

Faith. He didn't know quite what to think about her anymore. She was beautiful, that was obvious. Sometimes she just seemed so distant, and at other times it was nice to have someone who understood what it took to fight against monsters. But... She'd gone tot he Dark Side. She'd tried to make a joke out of it, but it wasn't funny. She'd killed people, human people. He wasn't certain if it helped that she'd been led astray by an amazingly successful evil politician who had used textbook perfect psychological manipulation or not. It made it easier to understood how everything could have happened. Understanding how it could have happened didn't make it better. She'd killed people, hurt people, and worked for a villain.

She was trying to do better now. In a way, she hadn't denied that she'd made mistakes, that she'd gotten lost and confused and needed to straighten her life out. Her mistakes were just so much bigger than most people's though. He honestly believed that she wanted to do better with her life now than she had before. She wanted a second chance. Part of him wanted to give it to her, especially since when she wasn't trying to look like a tough, knowledgeable Slayer, Faith looked so young. Too young to be fighting demons and vampires.

Closing his eyes, Riley admitted to himself that he wanted Faith to do better this time; he wanted her to get that second chance. At the same time, the more he learned about her past, the less he liked it. Every scrap of knowledge about just how bad she'd been as a bad girl was hard to stomach, and it made it hard to look at her and see someone trying to do better. That difficulty meant that despite the fact that she was hot and knew exactly how to use that, the simmering attraction wouldn't work. How could he have a relationship like that with someone whose past kept making him cringe?

Maybe he was getting ahead of himself. Before there could be any question of relationships or a future at all, they had to get rid of Adam. They would have to survive getting rid of Adam. Hopefully the rocket launchers would work.

He picked Graham up from the college campus, driving towards Steve's house. For a few moments, there was only awkward silence.

"I got a pair of rocket launchers. Faith thought maybe if bullets and tazers wouldn't work, something bigger might." Riley mumbled, and shot the other soldier a glance, not quite wiling to ponder the depths of grief and pain he could see. "I figured that if I got one for each of us, we could catch him in a crossfire."

"Makes sense," Graham agreed. "Do you think that Forrest... that Adam has him?"

"I don't know." Riley considered the question, considered what he'd seen on the disks and what Adam had said the other night. "Maybe."

"We'll need more than just the two of us, even with rocket launchers. I don't mean just inviting Faith along either, he had quite a few subordinates with him." Graham's voice was firm. "If we can figure out where he is, we should take a couple squads in after him, so that we can get all the followers too."

"Yeah. I've got a few ideas about where he might be hiding." Riley agreed, and then considered. "I think if we have several squads check out the possible places and then radio for backup if they find him, things should be workable."

Riley took the cowardly path, and decided to ask Faith to patrol with Graham's group. She was just so confusing at times, and if he was trying to figure her out, he wouldn't be paying as much attention to patrolling as he should. Inattention led to carelessness, which led to injury and death.

He wasn't surprised to see her waiting at Steve's. "Did you manage to get the launchers? Cause if you didn't, we need to come up with plan B."

Graham went over to talk with Steve, and Riley caught something about 'weak points' and 'aim.' It sounded like more discussion about where the shots might have the biggest effect. Maybe he should see if there were any easy targets, after he talked to Faith.

"I got two, so we should be able to try for plan A." Riley offered a small smile, and then decided to just go for it. "Faith, about tonight..."

"You're not going to convince me not to go out looking for Adam." Faith's voice was firm, and she leaned against the house. "So, unless it was 'Faith, stay home', what did you have in mind?"

"No, I didn't think you'd stay out of this. I want you to patrol with Graham's squad tonight." Riley didn't even try to talk her out of going.

"Why his group?" Faith sounded puzzled, and glanced over at Graham.

"Forrest was my friend, and I'm still upset that he's gone, but Graham's taking it really hard. A lot harder than I am, and..." Riley paused, again deciding not to ask too many questions. "I'm worried that it'll keep him from noticing everything that he should. I'd like you to watch out for him. I've already lost one friend, I don't want to loose another."

Faith glanced over at Graham, and there was a subtle shift in her expression, nothing that Riley could explain. "He does seem a bit lost by that. Yeah, I can go with him tonight."

End part 1.

Faith followed Graham, adjusting the pair of knives and the bundle of stakes. She'd felt petty loaded, until she saw Graham tucking a revolver under his jacket and lifting a bulky looking gun. "So, what does that do? Scare them into submission?"

"It's a stun gun," he chuckled. "It does look pretty big. Kind of like it should be on one of Steve's sci-fi shows. It shoots a little dart and then sends a few hundred volts of electricity right into the target. We're supposed to bring them back alive."

"So, the other one's for the cases where that doesn't work?" Faith grinned, patting the bundle of stakes. "It's really not worth trying to catch the vamps. Just stake 'em and be done with it."

"What if we run into something else?" He pulled his keys out of a jacket pocket, and settled into the driver's seat.

"That's why I've got a couple knives, crackers." Faith pulled out her flirting smile, just for the practice.

He gave a sad little smile. "Bet the crackers from a box taste better. It's good to know that you're prepared."

"Speaking of preparations, what happens when we find Adam?" Faith settled into the seat, the knife at her back pressing against her spine.

"Mine's in the trunk, it would be a bad idea to leave it in the seat where anyone might notice. Against university policy, you know." The car headed away from the house, and he gave a half grin. "We're picking up a couple guys in town for a sweep."

"A couple guys, huh? Is that one for me and one for you, or do I get them both?" Faith teased, hoping to make him blush and stammer the way she could Steve or Riley.

"Get the hostiles first, then you can try to ask them out." Graham smirked at her, and then added, "But some of them might not take you very seriously later. Giving up too much too fast... It kind of makes a guy think less of you."

For a few moments, Faith just blinked, astonished that he'd actually said that. Now all she had to do was figure out if he just going along with the joke or if he was taking her party girl image seriously. "uhh, right. Slay the baddies first, party later."

Chuckling, Graham pulled up to a sporting goods shop, waving at a pair of guys. "Ready to go?"

The guys jogged over to the car, both having the same remarkable fitness that Riley and Graham showed. The first one glanced inside, his eyes twinkling as he spotted Faith. "I thought this was official?"

"It's time to slay the baddies, soldier boys," Faith purred. "Think you can keep up?"

"Are you sure about this?" The second guy asked, a tilt of his head indicating Faith.

"She can pull her weight on this." Graham shook his head, and started towards the warehouses in the old industrial section. "There's a lot of abandoned factories, there's a chance that Adam and his subordinate HST's might be using one of those as a base."

Graham pulled the car into a parking place in front of an old fish cannery. "Ready to check for HST's?"

Everybody slid out of the car, the guys grabbing their stun guns as Faith rolled her shoulders. Faith tried to get a feel for anything off, so that she could be prepared. She was pretty sure she was picking up some evil vibes, but not strong enough for it to be Adam. She pulled a knife in her right hand and held a stake in her left, just in case there were vamps. "I'm ready."

"These guys aren't your basic muggers, they won't be afraid of a knife." One of Graham's guys muttered.

The other soldier pushed open the door, raising an eyebrow at the smooth ease of it. "Someone's definitely been using this one. No rust."

Inside, they saw that some of the machines had been pushed aside, while others remained, with a series of gleaming blades and several dark stains on the floor. A group of man sized figures in hooded robes started moving towards them, one of them gesturing and snarling a few words in Spanish. Faith wasn't sure of the finer details, but she'd lay money that it could be translated as 'get them,' after all, the bad guys always said things like that.

The soldiers shot their stun guns at the first two charging robed figures, dropping them in twitching heaps. Faith moved, slashing at the next one, sending it to the ground clutching at its stomach as she kicked the feet out of another one. "Stop the leader, he's charging for one of the old semi doors."

Graham pulled his other gun and shot twice, causing the fleeing demon to fall to the ground. "He's been stopped."

"Umm, Miller? What happened to get them alive?" The first guy asked.

"There's a hand sticking out of the trash can." Graham explained.

The second soldier nodded, and then fired into the head of one of the stunned demons before giving a shrug and the unconvincing, "thought I saw him move, sir."

Graham's radio crackled, and Riley's voice came through. "Requesting backup at the burned out high school. Preliminary reports of at least twelve hostiles."

Clicking a button, Graham relied, "On our way. Mulberry out."

"Mulberry?" Faith asked. "Riley's lilac and you're mulberry, what's up with that?"

In unison, the soldiers spoke, "Never let a botany major pick the codenames."

Faith just started laughing. "Alright, I guess it's back to school. It's probably Adam; the big evil always heads for that place. Besides that, there's not going to be too many bad guys with that many minions in town at once, and if it was just vamps, he would have said so, right?"

"You've done things like this before, haven't you?" The first soldier asked. Remembering himself, he blushed a little as he added, "I'm Brian, and that's Murphy."

"Yeah, I've been slaying for a while." Faith decided not to mention her medical vacation to coma-land. "A couple years. And I'm Faith. If the guy we think is running what's up at the high school, think of a demonic updated Frankenstein monster looking to upgrade his flunkies with a few spare parts."

"What if it's not the same guy?" Murphy asked.

"Decapitation works almost every time." Faith grinned, and left the seat belt off. "I have some really ugly memories of that school..."

"Almost? What do you mean, almost?" Brian gulped. "Is this anything like ants crawling around headless for a while?"

"Yeah, except the demons generally still have the nasty claws. It's just pretty hard for them to aim without their heads, so they're fighting blind. Generally they're pretty mad if you get their heads off, so it makes 'em meaner." Faith grinned, and reached back to pad his shoulder. "Don't worry, I'll watch out for you guys."

"We're here." Graham commented, turning into a parking lot. "Be ready."

Faith swallowed as she looked at the building. Parts of it were gone, more of it was charred. The big tree that she'd planned patrols with Buffy under was gone, leaving only a charred stump. This was where Dick had died.

"Guys, just remember, bullets may not kill all of them, but taking out the knees sure slows them down." Faith tried to offer a little reassurance of her own.

Another jeep full of guys in camouflage pulled up, their direction suggesting that they'd been out in the cemeteries where they didn't need to be able to blend with regular people.

"We're going in. Elm out." The driver of the jeep spoke into his radio. Releasing the button of his radio, he growled, "stupid botany codenames."

End part 2.

The group moved towards the school. Faith suddenly shook her head, and tapped Graham's elbow. "Where are the demons? This was a school, depending on their location, we might be able to approach from multiple directions."

"Good idea." Pulling out the radio, he clicked the button before saying, "This is mulberry, can we get a location for the hostiles?"

: Lilac here, they appear to be gathered in the auditorium. This is definitely Adam's group, and he appears to be making a speech. I repeat, this IS Adam's group.:

Graham looked up, eyes troubled. "Faith, you explain to these guys what approaches to take, you have some familiarity with the building. I'm need something from the car."

One of the camouflaged men muttered something about not the time for dating.

Faith pointed towards the broken portion of roof. "That's the auditorium. There's the main doors from the back of the seats, those are two sets of double doors connecting to a hallway. There's a single door on the side from another hall, and a door that gives stage access. That one will probably bring you in real close to Adam and any personal bodyguards that he has. Expect a lot of demons in the auditorium; there was seating for five hundred students. If there were only a few, he could have found a smaller place to go on about his master plan for world domination."

"How do you know that's his plan?" The jeep's driver asked.

"These bad guys have a few things in common. They either want to end the world, or rule it." Faith shrugged, pushing down the pang of guilt at the memory of Dick. This was where he'd planned to make things start. "Either way, they generally need a lot of flunkies to try and make things happen."

"Agent Lilac and his team are in the rear of the auditorium, we'll need to move from the sides." The jeep driver glanced up, his jaw dropping as he stared towards the parking lot. "Damn, Miller, what in the hell do you think you'll need a rocket launcher for? A dragon?"

"No, Adam. He shrugged off both the tazer and the pistol fire like you would a mosquito. That tells me that I need a bigger weapon." Graham's expression was uncompromising. "I'd rather blast him to bits than not take him down at all."

"Fair enough." The man swallowed, and then looked at the rest of the soldiers. "Don't block his line of fire, okay?"

With that, they moved inside, taking out some vampire sentries at the school doors. Faith tossed the jeep driver a stake before stabbing the first stunned vamp. "Just dust them, it's safer than leaving them at our backs."

A second dust pile later and they were inside, moving towards the auditorium. Graham made a few hand motions, indicating that the group from the jeep should take the second door, and waved Faith, Brian and Murphy to follow him to the first set. Faith could feel the evil, like a wave of hot, humid air itching over her skin.

They moved into the backstage, hearing a voice as soon as the door was edged open. "... once the weaknesses have been removed, we shall seize control. Those who oppose us will only strengthen our numbers, and we shall be unstoppable!"

Faith had a bad feeling about the covered mass beside him. There was something on a table, all covered by a sheet, with several cables running up and underneath.

At Graham's signal, they struck at the demons standing with Adam. Faith was distantly aware of the sound of doors opening as she ducked a punch from something large, covered with red scales and only having one eye. As she stabbed a stake at that eye, she could hear gunfire. Hopefully that was from the soldiers and not the demons. There were demon roaring, and the sounds of chairs being ripped from the floor, crashing into the floor again.

Brian was tackled by something that looked halfway between a basketball player and one of those plate-backed dinosaurs, and the fall managed to drag the sheet away from the table. Looking rather like a display, there was a second patchwork man. She could see a spot that looked like green scales, and the gleam of metal.

There was anguished shout from Graham, "Forrest!"

There was a dull whine and a cloud of smoke as Graham fired the rocket launcher. Almost like an echo, she could hear Riley fire the second one.

End part 3.

One explosion later, the world was silent. Faith and the others continued to fight, dropping demons that opened their mouths in silent screams. Guns jerked, releasing bullets with only tiny flashes of light, and vampire ashes drifted to the ground like sand.

There wasn't much left of Adam. Faith limped to the stage, almost certain that her footsteps should have echoed slightly on the stage. Brian was wrapping his shirt around his arm, blood changing it from gray to crimson. Something that looked like a wide-bladed throwing knife made from green leather had been dropped to the stage beside him, and the table had been knocked over. Graham knelt beside the altered body of Forrest Gates, looking horrified.

By this point, Faith was starting to hear a pulsing roar in her ears, accompanied by the odd buzzing ringing that meant her hearing was trying to come back. Kneeling beside Brian, she gave him a quick grin before grabbing his cell phone out of his pants pocket.

She dialed the hospital, still unsure how well she would hear anyone who picked up. "I need some ambulances at the Sunnydale High School."

:... nature of... how many...: She could only catch a few words between the roaring and buzzing in her ears.

"I got about six guys here who need a doctor real soon or they're dead. Something blew up, I can't hear right, but there's a lot of blood. At the old Sunnydale High School, we're in the auditorium." Faith hoped that the person would take her seriously. "Please hurry."

:... dispatched, but if this... be there in ten minutes.:

Faith tried to smile, not quite managing as she looked at the carnage in the auditorium. "I hope the EMT's have strong stomachs."

Hanging up the phone, she tucked it back into Brian's pocket. "Thanks."

"Moving a bit fast for a first date, aren't you?" She could tell that he was teasing, trying to keep himself from panicking. "We've barely met and you're already getting into my pants."

Reaching out, she squeezed his shoulder. "Hey, I know what I want. There's supposed to be people on their way."

Faith looked at the stage, seeing Brian with his arm wrapped. Graham was still kneeling by Forrest's body. Murphy was... Faith swallowed, seeing that Murphy was already beyond help. She started walking, wanting to make sure that all the downed demons were dead and not just waiting for a chance to slip away or attack someone else. Murphy wasn't the only soldier killed, though she didn't know the names of any of the others. Riley was leaning against a chair, one hand on his ribs and his arm dangling at an angle that could only mean a dislocated shoulder.

"Hey soldier," Faith offered, not quite certain what to say.

"How bad is it?" Riley's voice sounded a bit funny, louder and flatter than normal.

"Murphy's dead. Forrest was on stage, and it seems Adam was making a few modifications." Faith took a deep breath, her head spinning at all the mingled smells. "There are some others who didn't make it, but I don't know their names. I called the hospital."

Sirens could now be heard in the distance.

"I guess they did send some people over." The auditorium seemed to shrug, and Faith reached out, clutching at the nearest chair for balance. Glancing down, she realized that what she'd assumed were a few little bumps and scrapes were bruises spreading over her shoulder, a slash revealing bone at her elbow, blood soaking the leg of her pants, and the pain of bruises covering most of her back and stomach. "ow."

"Faith?" Riley reached out for her as the floor shifted. For a moment, he looked confused, and then he looked at the bodies, human and demon, on the auditorium floor. "After everyone's patched up, we need to talk."

She nodded, closing her eyes as the simple motion seemed to make the world spin. "Right, later we talk."

The room echoed as more people entered the auditorium. "We got a call about some injured people... Mother of God, what happened here?"

"This happens in this town, Leo. It either gets reported as 'gang violence' or 'wild animal attacks' depending on the type of injury." The second voice sounded older. "Start checking for pulses on the human ones, if you get one, we take them in."

Dimly, Faith realized that this mean she'd wake up in the hospital again. It had taken quite a while to get out the last time she'd gone into one of those... The floor rushed up at her, and Faith sank into familiar unconsciousness.

End part 4.

End Faith & Second Chances 18: Shooting in the Darkness.


	19. Tending the Wounds

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Faith

Faith and Second Chances 19: Tending the Wounds

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

Set in season 4, just after the body switching has been reversed.

Riley paced along the hospital hallway, trying to sort out his reactions. Part of him wanted to be appalled at what had happened. Faith had stalked through the auditorium, killing every downed hostile that she found with no sign of hesitation or remorse. It looked so easy for her. Just... a swipe of one of those knives, and there was more death. Another part was horrified at what had been on the stage. Not just the blasted bits of Adam, but Forrest, altered so that he had demon parts sewn onto him, in horrible transplants.

Those files had been full of things like that. Details of how it could be accomplished, procedures and drugs to smooth the process, a list of what organs it was simpler to replace and what ones were too much trouble to change. The files had been horrible, damning Maggie Walsh to whatever hell she had wound up in. It hurt to know that she'd been doing that to them, to the very people that she'd promised to watch over and lead.

As chilling as it had been to see her walking through and leaving death, he knew that those same demons would only have killed his soldiers, killed civilians if they'd survived. She had saved them, saved so many more people by her actions. By that measure, he should be thinking of her as a hero.

Soldiers had died, and more of them had been wounded. He didn't trust the remaining Initiative doctors and scientists not to be following some sort of personal plan, or the same plan that had resulted in Adam, had stolen Forrest's body and altered it. If that body had awakened, would his friend have been in there, trapped in a nightmarish existence, or would there have been something dark and evil looking out of part of his friend's face?

Adam was destroyed, and between the soldiers and Faith, his pack of followers had been removed. Sunnydale was safer, though not safe. There would be more hostiles, more vampires, but without a leader they would be less effective. There would still need to be a bit of cleaning up, and a few good sweeps of the old industrial section and the older graveyards as well. Unfortunately, that would be the easy portion. There was still the confusion left in the Initiative. Who would be in charge now that Walsh was gone? Would the project be closed, and if so, what would happen to the soldiers?

Many of the soldiers were expected to make full recoveries, given enough time. Some would even be able to leave the hospital tomorrow. There were just a few that were still in unstable condition, their fates uncertain. All because of one woman with delusions of grandeur, a scientist wanting to play God and create life from death. The fact that so many of them were still alive to recover could be partially credited to Faith. If not for her walk of death, killing any hostile that had still been twitching, more of the soldiers would have died, as well as some of the rescue personnel.

Faith was a killer. But she had only been killing to protect. Looking at the rooms where his unit rested, wounded and medicated, it occurred to him that he would have killed, even had the foes been human, to protect his men. Could he fault Faith for having the same protectiveness for her people? Not if he wanted to be able to face himself in the mirror, though it did sound like she'd made a few bad judgments about who the right people were. The mess with the Mayor that Buffy had mentioned had been Buffy's senior year, when Buffy was eighteen. Was Faith the same age as Buffy? Older? Younger?

He should be glad that Faith was sorting herself out, figuring out what her mistakes were. Figuring out how to avoid them in the future. Aching, he made his way towards the room where Faith was supposed to be resting. Her leg had been gashed open, and he'd been amazed that she had been able to walk on it, let alone deal out death like that tot eh fallen hostiles.

Slowly, he walked to the door, leaning in to look at her. Faith looked almost fragile, her hair contrasting to the pillow. Fragile and young. "Faith?"

"Hey there, soldier boy." Her voice was soft, and she blinked at him. "How bad was it?"

"They had to put about thirty stitches in your leg. You've got bruises everywhere, they're worried about a concussion..."

"I didn't mean me. I meant everybody else. How many aren't going out again, how bad were the rest wounded." Faith interrupted him, and then her voice softened a little. "I know I'll be okay in a while, it just hurts right now."

"Everybody that was still alive when the medics got to us will stay that way. We lost four men." Riley paused, considering what he'd managed to learn. "I don't know how complete the recoveries will be. Some of the guys looked like they'd been hurt pretty bad, they might have taken permanent damage."

"Hunting demons and vamps will scar you up, inside and out." Faith closed her eyes, and wiped at her face. Had that been a tear glimmering on her cheek? "I guess it's better than getting killed."

"You could have been killed helping us." He wasn't certain what to say. 'Thanks' sounded inadequate, and part of him wanted to tell her 'don't ever put yourself in danger like that again', which he suspected would get him hurt.

"Beats spending the weekend watching weird sci-fi." Faith shrugged, trying to act casual.

"Faith..." Riley shook his head, trying to figure out how she could be so casual.

She shook her head, pulling herself into a sitting position. "Look, I'm a Slayer. Maybe not the best there's ever been, maybe not even the best this decade, but I can't change it. I can't not be a Slayer; I can't ignore the demons and vamps. If I don't look for them, they'll look for me."

"That's dangerous. Especially if you don't have good backup." Riley protested.

"Hell, why do you think most Slayers last less than a year?" Faith snarled. "Of course it's dangerous. Live fast, fight hard, and die young."

Riley gasped, unable to even put words to the feeling that spread inside him at her pronouncement. A year? A year was good?

He must have made a sound, because her glare softened a little. "It's not my idea, it was never my idea. Fate just tapped me on the shoulder, sucker punched me with this, and I have to deal with it. Right up until I die, and when that happens, it'll probably be messy and painful. It's just... Thanks to you, when that happens, I'll be fighting on the right side."

"A year..." Riley finally managed, collapsing to sit on the end of the bed. "That's it?"

"Some don't even make it that long. Not counting my coma, I don't think I'm doing too bad now. I got a bit off the right path for a while, but I'm doing better." Faith muttered.

"How long will you be here?" Riley looked at her, noticing that they hadn't even put an IV into her arm. "I mean, in the hospital."

"They wanted to keep me overnight, and then they said I could leave when I could walk out the door under my own power." Faith shrugged, and grinned at him "I guess that means I can go now, if I wanted."

"What?" Riley couldn't have heard that right. He knew that he couldn't have heard her say she could leave now. "Thirty stitches in your leg. A concussion. Bruises everywhere, maybe along your spine. All that, and you think you could just walk out of here? A hospital is the safest place for you, Faith."

"Wrong. A hospital is public domain, Riley. Open to anybody in need of help. Unfortunately, that opens it up to a few more. Any vamp could just walk right into the building, right into any room except maybe the chapel, and the only thing to stand in their way is the hospital staff. Most just don't think of it." She shivered, and her eyes took on a glazed, haunted look. "They could just walk right in and try to finish you off. It's happened before."

"Public..." Riley faltered at the implications of her words. "What do you mean, it's happened before?"

"Penny showed me some of the older Watcher's journals. There have been a few occasions when a Slayer got hurt real bad, and their Watcher took her to the hospital. Five got killed when something went after them in the hospital." Faith hesitated, and then looked at him, whispering, "My first month as a Slayer, there was this pack of nasty little demons... I can't even remember what kind now. About waist high little lizards with big teeth. They looked like something out of Jurassic Park, and they ripped us up something awful. A vamp came right into the emergency room, white coat, scrubs, stethoscope... the whole get up. He tried to eat Penny, and I had to cut his head off with a scalpel."

"Oh my God..." Riley shook his head, imagining how horrible that would feel. "If you're sure, I can give you a lift back to Steve's."

"Yeah. I just don't feel safe here." Faith tried to smile. "That and you can lose time in places like this. A lot of time."

"If you can walk, I'll get you out of here." Riley offered, and stood up.

Her movements were slow, lacking her usual grace, but Faith slid from the bed, standing up. Her face was paler than normal, and her eyes seemed much brighter. "Okay, I'm standing. I want out of here."

Riley moved beside her, ready to catch her if she fell, but letting her walk. She signed herself out, the last name an illegible scrawl that apparently satisfied the person at the desk, and promised to take her medicines.

As he drove away from the hospital, pretending that he didn't hear Faith hissing at each bump in the road, Riley wondered what would happen to him and the other soldiers of the Initiative. A corner of his mind decided that Faith probably wouldn't be the only person starting over in the near future.

Glancing at her, he said, "I hope I can still be there to help you in the future. They're going to have to do something, after this, and I don't know where I'll end up."

Faith shrugged. "Maybe I can go with you. There's nothing left for me in Sunnydale, no reason to stay."

"I can't become the focus of your life." The words were soft.

"I didn't ask you to." Faith winked at him. "Not that you'd be bad company on a cold night, but I was sort of hoping more for someone to help keep me on the side of helping people. I can find some guy to hop in the sack with me anywhere. Someone who cares what happens is a lot harder to find."

Riley didn't want to think too much about why the idea of Faith hopping into bed with some random guy bothered him. She was attractive, but she'd done terrible things, killed people. He didn't want to be her boyfriend. He wasn't even sure if he could help keep her focused on the straight and narrow.

But there was a tiny part of him that wished he could be her boyfriend.

End Faith & Second Chances 19: Tending the Wounds.


	20. A Chance to Find Herself

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Faith

Faith and Second Chances 20: A Chance to Find Myself

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

Set in season 4, just after the body switching has been reversed.

Faith pretended to sleep on the couch. Spaces of time kept vanishing, so she figured that she was dozing a little, but it wasn't a very restful sleep. Things would be better if pain meds worked on her like normal people, but they didn't, and those thirty stitches in her leg hurt. So did her leg.

What would happen to her now? The Initiative... was that toast? Did they have things in hand now that Adam was gone? Would Riley really be sent somewhere else, like he figured?

Too many questions. She needed to simplify things. Pain bad, Adam bad and exploded. Riley... nice. She didn't want to stay in Buffy's town. She didn't want to be alone anymore. Steve's couch was lumpy.

Nobody was trying to push her into being anything now. No more Penny pushing for her to become the best Slayer that she could. If she left, no Buffy pushing for her to be the bad girl, everything a Slayer shouldn't be, a failure. No more Giles pushing her to be a dark-haired Buffy. No more Dick pushing her to be his perfect little killer princess. What would she do with her life, if nobody was pushing her to be what they wanted?

She'd still be a Slayer, right up until she died. That wasn't something that she could change. Dark hair was also fine... she needed more sleep. What did her hair color have to do with anything? Since she was going to be a Slayer, she wanted to be a good, effective Slayer that didn't get killed any time soon, but she didn't want to be Buffy, not anymore. She didn't want to be like Buffy either. "I'm Faith, the Slayer. Nobody else."

Riley walked in, dropping himself into a chair. "Urggh. Initiative's closing. The whole operation, and it's being classified."

"So, I follow the closing thing. Scary project run rampant, people dead, bad idea," Faith nodded, wondering if Riley's words would make more sense if she'd got some sleep. "Classified? Running on no sleep here."

"Not only are they closing it down, they're wrapping it up in red tape and shoving it into the deepest, darkest bureaucratic hole they can, and telling everybody that we're not allowed to talk about it. If we do, they'll toss us into another deep, dark hole. One with bars on the windows." Riley looked about as happy as she felt, though he didn't seem to be in as much pain. He had picked up some injuries, though none of them looked serious.

"Will you be posted somewhere else?" Faith asked, deciding that he didn't need to talk more about the mess of Adam, painful injuries, dead friends, or monsters in the high school.

"Probably." For what felt like a long time, he just sat there, watching her. "Were you serious, last night?"

Faith blinked, her mind flickering through hazy memories. "There was a lot of last night. Which part do you mean? Hospitals as public domain, hell yeah. Kill the demons before they get me, damn straight. Give me Jell-O and whipped cream, no."

"I... think I must have missed that one," Riley blushed, for a few moments looking everywhere but at Faith. "I meant about asking if you could go with me to wherever I go next."

"Sure. There's nothing to keep me here, and a bunch of reasons to leave. I might as well go somewhere with a familiar face, someone to try to keep me from going too far into the dark, you know?"

"I could get sent to a war zone," Riley cautioned.

For a few moments, Faith thought about the various war movies that she'd seen, and Sunnydale. Looking at Riley, she arched an eyebrow, muttering "As opposed to the nice, safe Hellmouth?"

"When you put it that way... I guess it might not be that bad to get sent to a war-zone. It certainly couldn't be more dangerous," Riley admitted. "But they might not want to let you go. Civilians - which you as you aren't military personnel with a chain of command, uniform, and paycheck - you are a civilian, are not supposed to hang out in war-zones. It might be unsafe."

"No chain of command means they can't tell me not to," Faith countered.

"If you still want to go, it might be nice to have someone around who knows what happened here, what's out there in the dark," Riley sounded thoughtful. "Someone who won't think I'm paranoid and crazy if I jump at shadows."

"It's not paranoia if they really are hiding scary things with big teeth," Faith insisted.

"You were right." Riley looked at her, his eyes serious.

"Of course..." Faith grinned, pausing as her leg throbbed. "Right about what?"

"I do care about you. Maybe not the way you're used to, maybe not the way that I should, but I care," Riley admitted.

"Umm... how do you care?" Faith asked, feeling confused.

"In confusion. I don't understand you, I can't understand how you could do some of what you did, and I know you want to do better, to be better. And I want you to do better, to be... I don't know. But... I don't..." Riley faltered, the words tangling on his lips. "I don't want you to fall into bad habits, not because they're easier, or because you figure you won't last long enough for them to come back to haunt you."

"I'm a Slayer. Most don't last a year after getting Chosen. I don't get happily ever after, I don't get miserable ever after. I get this thing, where I have to fight and kill or die, and in the end, I'm going to die anyhow. Most likely, it's going to hurt a hell of a lot when it happens," Faith paused, thinking back to her earlier days, when she'd looked though some of the books Penny had tried to hide. The ones that old how quickly new Slayers were Called, and how messy their deaths tended to be. "I just want more than a long list of fights, injuries, and I killed him or them before they got me when my time's up, you know? A couple times to look back on and say, yeah, that was good."

"What would you have done with your life if you weren't a Slayer?" Riley asked.

Faith pondered his words. "I don't know. I was raised to know, to expect to be a Slayer. If I hadn't... the potentials who don't get called sometimes go on to become martial arts instructors, bodyguards. I heard some went into monster hunting anyhow... They generally last about like a Slayer, maybe less."

"What would you be doing right now, in a world without monsters?" Riley's words were soft, wistful. "Forrest, Graham and I would be sitting back, talking about the weekend, teasing Forrest about saying the wrong thing and getting himself in trouble, teasing Graham about saying nothing."

"I can't even imagine," Faith whispered. "It would be nice to figure out, but... you know, too late for that kind of thing."

"Who are you, besides a Slayer?" Riley asked, his voice soft.

"You paid attention in those psych classes, didn't you?" Faith accused, not quite glaring.

"Yeah. But you were Faith before you became a Slayer, and you're still Faith. What else is there besides a Slayer?" Riley insisted.

"I don't know anymore," Faith whispered.

Riley gave her a small smile. "Maybe you can find out?"

Yeah, maybe she could. More than a Slayer, beyond the fun-loving bad girl that didn't need to care, that didn't need to stay. Beyond the scared girl who'd run from Kakistos.

It was time for her to rediscover who Faith really was.

End F&SC20: A Chance to Find Herself.


	21. Leap of Faith

Author: Lucinda

similar to the series, with chances of violence and moderate sexuality

main characters: Riley, Faith

Faith and Second Chances 21: Leap of Faith

Disclaimer: I do not own any characters from Buffy the Vampire Slayer.

Distribution: Wic, Paula, Cat - anyone else ask first.

Set in season 4, just after the body switching has been reversed.

Faith zipped the bag, pressing it slightly to force it closed. She'd tucked in a few shirts, her other two pairs of pants, her one skirt, and some weapons. Well, mostly weapons. A half dozen knives, a pair of short swords, a little crossbow and some bolts for it, and some stakes. Just the basics, really.

One bag. Her life fit into one duffel bag, with a lot of ugly memories. "Damn."

"Faith? Did you still want to head out of town with me?" Riley's voice was soft, non-threatening. As if either option - to stay or go - would be just as acceptable to him.

Blinking, she looked at him, the fading bruises over his arm and face, the slight stiffness of not-quite healed muscles, the tentative smile on his face. He was worried about her, asking if she wanted to go with him, but he wasn't asking her for anything, not like Penny or Dick had asked.

"Yeah, I'll go with you. I want to get out of this hellhole before it eats me up and spits out a messy lump of flesh that might not even be identifiable as me," Faith replied, hefting the bag onto her shoulder.

"Graphic," he muttered. "Then again, considering what I've seen here, entirely possible."

"It's one of the things I learned early on," Faith murmured, following him out of the house. "If I'm lucky, though I'm not sure if that would be good luck or bad, I might die from being hit my a truck or drowning or something like that. Otherwise, it's painful death at the claws of something most people won't want to admit exists."

"I guess that might explain why you don't worry too much about some rules. How about taxes?" riley looked like he was trying to change the subject from gory, painful death.

"The odds were against me even living to be legal to get a job with a paycheck," Faith snorted. "And what would I be qualified for? I don't think slaying monsters and sensing imbalances in the force go on a resume, and who'd believe that I can lift a guy your size and toss him?"

"Anyone that you pick up and throw across a room," Riley muttered, and then rubbed at the back of his head. "Though I have to admit that the whole Slayer thing does sound pretty unbelievable the first time."

"I suppose Buffy told you," Faith muttered, feeling annoyed at the other Slayer. Buffy got the good mom, the sexy Watcher, the friends... and of course, she gets a guy who'd understand.

"She didn't tell me anything until a bunch of demons stole everyone's voices, and I ended up there with a couple guns, and she was there, and then she screamed and made their heads explode. That's what it took for her to share things with me," Riley sounded hurt.

"I didn't think she was enough of a loudmouth the really kill something by screaming," Faith whispered.

"Wha..." Riley shook his head, chuckling. "They were some kind of demon. I think Giles called them the Gentlemen, and I'm not sure why."

"Probably something tied up in centuries old myth," Faith grumbled. "It's either old myths or translations from other languages."

"If you say so. Apparently, the reason they took everyone's voices - and I don't know how they did that - was because a woman's scream would kill them. That sounds pretty weird to me, but if some water hurts vampires when other water doesn't, and some metals hurt demons when others don't... I guess it's not that much stranger."

"Lots of mystical stuff going on with the whole hundred and one ways to kill demons thing," Faith smiled. "So, where are we going?"

"Well, I have orders to go to Houston, Texas. After some time there for a few tests on some of the stuff I've been allegedly learning and a lot of paperwork…" Riley paused, eyes half unfocused as he leaned against his jeep. "I don't know where I'll end up stationed. I'm hoping that it's not dull, but not deadly."

"I know there's a lot of vamps near the Rio Grande, I'll have a lot to keep me busy." Faith commented. "Maybe I'll pick up some Spanish, get used to tequila."

"Aren't you underage for that stuff?" Riley sounded as if he was torn between amusement and dismay.

"Like I'm going to live to see twenty one…" Faith snorted. "Thanks to that coma, I've lasted much longer than most Slayers, but… I doubt I'll have a few years ahead of me."

Riley was quiet, watching as she dropped the bag onto the back seat. He started the car, and began driving away from the coast. "How many years would it take, Faith? How far from twenty one are you?"

"Riley? Can you jump across the Grand Canyon?" Faith asked, deciding that he didn't need to know just what her age was. It wasn't very good at explaining her anyhow. She wasn't legal to drink alcohol, but she had to fight monsters that could rip spines out and devour livers. She might as well be a hundred.

"Of course not." Riley glanced at her, frowning. "What does that have to do with anything?"

"If you know that you can't make it, does it really matter how far it is?" Faith whispered. "Most Slayers are considered really good if they make it for six months. Three is more normal. Considering that, it doesn't really matter how far off twenty one is, I won't live to get there anyhow."

"You've got this fixation with death going, Faith. It's probably unhealthy." Riley paused, licking his lips before he continued in a softer voice, "But I see your point. As a Slayer, you're probably not even being paranoid about that estimate. My Psych classes all suggest that I should try to convince you that you'll probably have a long life ahead of you, full of opportunities… This is where you try to contain the laughter, because we both know that whoever wrote those books has no idea that there are monsters out there."

Faith pondered his words as Riley started the jeep, and started to drive away from Sunnydale. The tires hummed over the road, and the engine made its own noises, and the radio was playing, some random station with the assortment of current pop music. Riley knew there were monsters, knew that the world was dangerous. "Not all of the monsters have claws and fangs. I knew about those a long time ago."

"That was a more recent lesson for me," Riley admitted. "Would it be nosy to ask when you learned that one?"

"A long time ago," Faith whispered, hoping the sounds of the jeep would drown out her voice. "Before I even knew that the other kind was real."

Riley's jaw dropped. "But you said that you'd been training to be a Slayer for several years before you were called!"

Faith just nodded, fighting to keep the memories from changing her expression. Memories of screaming matches, of her mom's boyfriend shattering a bottle of some sort of drink before waving the sharp edges at her mother while she'd cowered in the pantry, hoping that he didn't know she was there. Seeing bruises on her mom from a different boyfriend, knowing that nobody would believe a single mother instead of an 'fine upstanding accountant'. Remembering how she'd gotten her first kiss from another one of her mom's lousy boyfriends when she was eight, and the way her skin had crawled from feeling his hands on her skin. The way she'd gotten drunk for the first time after that, trying to wash away the taste of his tongue in her mouth.

A long, awkward quiet hung between them, as the radio played several songs. Finally, Riley spoke again. "Maybe what you need is to learn about heroes. I don't mean Slayers, though there is something heroic in what you do. I mean, people who didn't have to, but did great things, or more than others thought they were capable of doing."

"I'm too old to believe in Prince Charming," Faith retorted, pulling her uninjured leg up on the seat. While her other one was doing better, it would still hurt to pull it up so far. "And Robin Hood was just a thief who knew his PR."

"Faith…" Riley sounded lost. "There are good people in the world. Sometimes it's just harder to see them. They aren't the ones in the spotlight, smiling for the cameras. They aren't there in the front of the crowd, or wearing shining armor. I'm pretty sure there's no Superman. But there are people, trying their hardest to make things better. Even when they don't see much progress, even if they feel like nobody's going to notice. Even if they can only help one person."

"You really believe that, don't you?" Faith wondered how Riley could still have so much faith in people after Sunnydale. After his friends had died, after the monsters, after Walsh. "You really believe that there are good people."

"Yes, I do. That's part of what lets me sleep at night," Riley paused his words, passing a slow moving pink car. "Well, that and exhaustion."

"I get the exhaustion part, but I've had to depend more lately on the knowledge that if something tries to get me in my sleep, I'll wake up and slice it open with the knife under my pillow," Faith commented. For a moment, she was jealous of Riley's confidence in people. Nobody had ever tried to tell her that there was someone out there trying to keep her safer…

"You sleep with a knife under your pillow?" Riley sounded shocked. "Isn't that dangerous?"

"Life's dangerous, Riley. Sometimes, you just have to decide which danger's bigger, the danger of your preparations, or the danger of not making them. Sometimes, the questions easier to answer than others, and sometimes, you make the wrong choice."

"Sometimes, all the preparations that you make still aren't enough, are they?" Riley murmured, though he might have been talking as much to himself as to her. "They weren't enough for Forrest."

"Sometimes they aren't," Faith agreed.

The next forty miles were driven in a gloomy, thought-filled calm. Faith was trying not to think of everyone that she knew who had failed to be ready enough, strong enough to prevent disaster. She presumed that Riley had similar thoughts that were just as unwelcome.

"I'm going to try to teach you to believe in heroes," Riley spoke suddenly. Glancing over at her, he added, "If you stick around, that is. You don't have to stay where I am."

Faith could feel herself start to smile. Maybe he could even succeed at such an impossible sounding task – teaching her to believe in heroes, in the good of human nature. "Where else would I go?"

End F&SC 21: Leap of Faith.

End Faith and Second Chances.


End file.
